I met someone and we spent 2 mos together – he took me camping with all his close friends, introduced me to his daughter, and would spend every single night during the week at my house for these 2 mos. He told me he really liked me and he met my parents and celebrated my birthday with me. He said he wanted to take things slow, but he was the one who wanted to spend every night together and bring his kid to meet me a few times, and would even leave his dog at my house. I did tell him about a month into it that we should slow down a bit on the time together or else I would get attached but it was going so well so I took his drive to spend time together as a good sign.

I was having a rough week last week and told him I wasn’t doing so well and needed some support and he pulled away and ended it the next day, stating he was “too tired with his job” and unable to treat me how I deserved. I did try to talk it out and say we could make it work with boundaries and not spending every night together but he ultimately said he made up his mind and left.

I have started no contact and logically know it is for the better and it wasn’t that long of a connection but I feel like I’m having a hard time because it was going so well and I got so used to spending every single night with him and maybe fell for the potential I saw. Does anyone have any pointers to help move past this person? I just keep thinking of all the good stuff and hoping he realizes what he is losing and comes back.

*I just want to note that I have dated people with kids and I never once pressured him or wanted to take time away from him as a father. Me asking for support was when he did not have his child nor was working – I only really wanted him to say “I’m here if you need me” and that was the straw that broke it*

1 comment
  1. I think you wanted for him to step up and give you more time and energy away from his job and daughter. This was a deal breaker for him, sorry!

    The only thing I can say to help is not to be so demanding of someone’s time if they have other commitments. But you can easily find someone without a lot of commitments but then might not be attracted to them as you will be turned off by their neediness.

    He might come around if you keep the door open and back off.

    You have an needy attachment style that comes from unavailable men. Look into it please.

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