25F Lost sex drive after boyfriend took advantage of me

I used to have so much sex drive that I would masturbate almost every day (25F) ever since I was a teen. To cut a long story short, in the first month of my relationship with my boyfriend, he always asked for sex, like every day. More than twice. There are a lot of times that I say no because sometimes I feel like I’ve given too much and sometimes I’m not in the mood, but he’d force me, like he never stops kissing my shoulders or neck or grabbing me by force, until I gave in. Most of the time, I give in just so he stops bothering me. I couldn’t finish any work because, from time to time, he’d come back and ask for sex. No matter how much I tell him that I’m not in the mood, even when I’m on my period, he never stops asking for sex. Sometimes he’d ask me, like verbally, to hand-job or blow-job him just out of the blue. Not even trying to set my mood first. As it went on, I slowly felt like pushing him away. I say no whenever I don’t really want to give it. I slowly feel like I’m just being used as a sexual object. Ive communicated with him that, aside from sex, I also love cuddling or just having deep conversations. I don’t like having sex every day because I don’t want it to lose its value. It’s supposed to be an expression of love, not just to satisfy an urge or horniness. There was even a time when I got so drunk because we had an argument, and he picked me up. He forced me to have sex, and I said no, and I could still remember him pinning me down on the bed, taking my clothes off, and forcing me to kiss him. I cried and begged him to stop because I was not in the mood and because I was so drunk I could puke, but he still went on. I couldn’t push him away because he’s too strong, so I just gave in and cried in the corner to sleep after he came. Although I was drunk and couldn’t walk straight, I could still remember what was happening. What’s worse was when, a few days later, I found out he took a video of me that night. I was clearly out, yet he still continued to molest me. I honestly feel raped. Ever since that time, I have lost interest in sex. I couldn’t get aroused anymore. I have to try so hard and prepare myself the whole day, even just to get into the mood, because he’d make me feel guilty for not having sex. He’d tell me, “It’s been 3 days since we’ve had sex,” or even “you’re supposed to do your girlfriend duties,” and I told him exactly “Those actions and words really turned me off, and that I’m really having problems with my sexual drive, and maybe my hormones are off”. I even asked him to maybe buy a libido booster for me so I could catch up with his sex drive. I still love him and want to be with him, but I’m getting frustrated that I can’t get wet or aroused anymore. I can’t even think of sex anymore until I force myself to think about it. I can’t even get wet thinking about it. I don’t get attracted to men anymore, even if they’re hot. I miss being horny almost every day. I miss getting wet so easily. I just want it back.