Why am I socially ignored and outcast? How others treat me make no sense.

By many accounts, I am a cool person. I’m always kind to others. I have a great job and a wealth of interesting topics to discuss. I’m not a super handsome dude, but I look good and I take care of myself. I avoid criticizing and do my best to engage people in conversation and be a good listener. All of this should be working.

So why is it that I just can’t build and maintain meaningful connections? Many people from my surroundings are just acquaintances. Sometimes I’ll briefly engage/be engaged in conversation with someone and it’s nice enough… small talk, mostly. It’s rarely something with good substance like sharing ideas or all but surface level opinions. These people seem to be on the horizon of being a friend but only a rare few actually make it there.

Sometimes, it even seems like I get avoided by others, as if it’s unpleasant to talk to me. I’ll often notice people coking and joking with others nearby me, but not with me. People just don’t come up to me for conversation. They don’t ask for my thoughts on things or how I’m doing. Sometimes I’ll be asked to hang out and go places with others, but it seems just as common if not more that I’m left out of events. For the record, I initiate conversations/events with mixed results.

I don’t get what I’m doing wrong. I have some ideas… I tend to speak quietly, so people sometimes don’t hear me or mishear. My sense of humor needs improvement, particularly when it comes to quips and storytelling. It also doesn’t help that my resting face looks like a sad one. That shouldn’t be enough to dissuade others, though. I’m trying to fix and build up my charisma. How do I get better? What am I doing to put others off or fail to bring them closer? Any ideas?