No intimacy with my wife

8 comments

1. When you say rules???

2. What kind of rules?

   There is no “should be xyz” amount of time- every relationship is different. Sex is a major point of contention in a lot of relationships though, usually with one person wanting it more than the other.

   If sex is something that is very important to you and you’re not getting enough and you’ve talked to your partner about it with no changes, that may not be your partner- but the only people who can really decide that is you and your partner.

3. Man I’d settle for once every two weeks lol. I’m older than you and have been married a long time. We’ve always had ebbs and flows in our sex life but lately it’s really taken a dip. When we do have sex it’s great. But it’s once a month if I’m lucky. And basically no intimacy beyond that too. She literally doesn’t touch me except during sex. It’s really hard.

4. Just file for divorce

5. I’m confused….so because your wife doesn’t want you to do certain things to her during sex that means that something is wrong with her? I’m not picking sides here though, because I totally understand your point aswell, it’s hard not getting what you need in your sex life, but I just don’t think your wife should lower her expectations (rule wise) for you, but that’s just my opinion!

6. I think it’s normal to feel frustrated, but you all have options here. Even with her rules (she can give oral not you. You can get a toy for her since she doesn’t like to receive oral), & her lower sex drive (everyone’s jumping right to menopause & it could be, but do you spend time romancing her? It goes a long way sexually with women). But you gotta communicate & be willing to compromise. Which I realize some people don’t like to do sexually.

   My husband doesn’t have rules in place, & we’ve been exploring different things sexually, but I don’t get it multiple times a day like I’d like. We were actually at 3-4x/week but have now dropped down to 1x/week. & I feel like the difference in our drives is what makes it most difficult for me, so my compromise is, I spend a lot of time self-pleasing. Good luck!

7. Communicate with her, have a talk what’s going on. If you both have different expectations for sex all the time maybe you’re just not a good fit.

8. The first thing is stop accepting shitty sex that you won’t enjoy.

   How much do you think you’ve let yourself go? Was sex always stunted or did it get worse?