My ex \[M23\] and I F\[21\] broke up suddenly two weeks ago because he said he had mental health issues but tbh I never really believed it. I know I sound crazy but I was stalking his spotify and saw that he had a new follower who made a playlist for him (“For \[Ex\]”) and she made the playlist public on her spotify account.
I was livid ofc because I asked my ex 100 times during the break up if it was really because of mental health or if he just didn’t want to be me / wants to be single and hook up with girls. Also, I thought he must have been talking to her during the relationship which is what led to him suddenly breaking up with me to be with her.
During the breakup, he said he didn’t want to hook up with anybody or be in a relationship for a long time and I believed him. Lowkey I’d be fine with the second reason but the mental health thing made me feel really bad for him and gave me false hope that we could be together after his mental health fixed up.I called him and I was so angry with him but he kept saying that that they were friends before and the spotify playlist didn’t mean anything. He doubled down on the mental health reason and was hurt that I think he could be doing that, but he understood why I would think that. I eventually got tired of yelling at him and just accepted it. We ended the call amicably, we were joking about it together, but after, I blocked him and his friends on my social media after.
Could he be telling the truth? I wouldn’t make a playlist for \*just\* a friend and name it that and make it public on my profile unless I was interested in them. Also why would she just be following him on spotify now? She also liked some of his posts on instagram but not the most recent ones.I don’t think my ex is wrong for trying to get with other people (although it is VERY soon after the break up to already have someone make a playlist for him), but I’m just upset that he was probably lying about the reason we broke up/was cheating during the relationship to explain the sudden break up.
What do I do now? I don’t know if I should be angry with him for what he’s doing or just take it at face-value that they could just be friends. I know we’re not together anymore so I can’t dictate or judge his life, I’m just more bothered that he could’ve been cheating/lying during the relationship.
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TLDR; my ex might be probably hooking up with girls and lying about the reason we broke up, am I right to still be mad?
5 comments
Why should you care? It’s an ex, you’re 20. Block and don’t look back and live your life
It’s a low blow to break up with someone and blame the reason on a serious issue that may not even be true. While probably an inappropriate scapegoat for his losing interest in you, I do believe mental health can still have a part in this. I reiterate, however, that to chalk it all up on mental health and meanwhile talking to an ex points to a bad reason.
If you don’t want to be hurt further, I kindly suggest you stop stalking him. You’re subconsciously looking for more reasons to be upset and bothered. I suggest you either pick up something to distract you, or move on
It doesn’t matter.
What matters is that he get far away from you.
>gave me false hope that we could be together after his mental health fixed up
Sorry that you are bothered but I think it’s clear that you are hurt by what happened but it’s best if you start to move on and heal.
It’s out of your control. If he wants to not be with you, you can’t change that regardless of the reason. The reason he broke up is irrelevant as the end result is the same.
I also caution you from just assuming he cheated unless you had reason to believe otherwise. It only will leave you feeling more frustrated
I’m sorry about the breakup. However, nothing here is evidence that he was lying. Furthermore, you should not be stalking him for both of your benefits.
Also “not believing” his mental health issues is kind messed up. That’s not your call to make.
Even if he is seeing another person now, that’s none of your business.
You are young, move on and find someone else. He isn’t worth getting hung up over.