Hello guys, lately I’ve been in my own head and have done some reflecting but still can’t reach a valid conclusion about myself. I’ve recently entered the work force as I’m working at an internship. This is my first job ever in a subject I really enjoy. However, my social skills are subpar compared to everyone else’s. I’m sorta quiet. It’s not like I only speak when spoken to. When I’m alone with one person I attempt to strike up conversation but somehow it always comes out awkward. In group setting I disappear because I can’t do multiple people talking at once. In fact I despise group work. I’ve accepted that I’ll always be a slightly awkward person and have low-key worked that but into my jokes using the awkwardness as irony. And I believe I come off as serious because I’m quiet but whenever my coworkers make jokes I chuckle to make sure i acknowledge I understand.
At first I summed it up a regional difference between my coworkers and I because the program is based on the city and I’m more from the country area where communication is slightly different. But, as I go on, I find myself feeling to be treated way differently than everyone else. It’s funny because me and my coworkers are just starting to speak and get along okay. It took a month but I’m finally making acquaintances with some of them. One coworker in particular who I believe has the same ironic type of humor as me has tried to be friend but they are slightly rude in nature. I think that’s apart of what they find funny but I don’t stand for it so I ultimately ended up backing away from it.
What bugs me the most are the adults running the program. I show much interest within the job part (ask some questions, direct all my attention) but I seem to be ignored or not as widely appreciated. My other coworkers slack off, joke a lot, take nothing serious. It’s like my passion is in vain. I feel as if I’m the most interested in the program yet the least valued. Am I over thinking?
This happened outside of work sometimes as well but it’s not like I’m antisocial. I have good friends, a partner, and family I communicate with. It’s just like when I try to communicate with others I blank and they treat me as if they are scared to speak to me or communicate with me on a lesser degree even if initiate the conversation. What am I doing wrong. Am I taking things too seriously? If anyone has tips on communication skills please tell me, it’s bugging me out severely.