I (37m) just had a third visit from the hottest woman (27f) I’ve ever been with. First time I had no problems getting 3 out. Second time it was trouble to finish. This evening, I couldn’t and even was soft.
She stayed 90 minutes I got her off several times orally. She told me that I was the best at that.
Enough bragging hahah…but I’m worried I really fucked up…or should I say didn’t fuck.
Ladies, would you go home happy?
45 comments
I’ve been seeing this woman for a long time now. Everytime we meet, we go multiple rounds. Anytime after 1 is a struggle to finish. When I don’t finish, she doesn’t say anything but I can see in her facial expression that she’s upset. One time we had planned to do anal. She had starved just for it. When we met, I finished in her pussy and she immediately wanted anal so she can eat so I tried but obviously got soft. *this* time she was more than visibly upset. She started saying “*this* is what I starved all day for”. Last time we met, I couldn’t finish during round 2 and basically said what’s the point of going more than 1 round if I never finish and that she’s satisfied with 1 round and its enough. She finishes multiple times, at least twice each round so she got off multiple times during round 2.
All this to say that she might be a little upset, but hopefully it won’t ruin your chances of seeing her again. Sounds like you guys have already established a previous relationship and if the vibes are right, you guys will move past this
I went to visit my boyfriend for about a week. Maybe longer. He could get hard and stay hard, but he couldn’t cum no matter how much I tried to “help” or how much he tried. The only time he could cum was when it was in or on my vagina. And because of my self esteem on my body, it didn’t happen often. So when he couldn’t cum from other ways, I started feeling crappy like there was something wrong with me or like he wasn’t really attracted to me. And what sucks more is I don’t feel like I can talk to him about it because I don’t want him to feel pressured or stressed about it next time. It just made me feel pretty crappy.
The condom was not helping. As soon as it went on I was done. Had three dead soldiers laying around the room to remind me of my failure haha.
Never had this problem before but I also haven’t been with a women in a few years. I’m afraid I don’t have it anymore…now I’m gonna be all in my head.
Bluechew here I come.
There’s just something about your partner finishing. Maybe it’s not all women, but for me I feel that much extra satisfied knowing we both finished
***Naturally, us women would think that if you’re not able to cum then it’s something about us. Then we’d probably get distant and disappear.***
***As a 35f, I no longer think that way. I usually have open conversations so there’s no confusion and so that neither of us are taking on guilt or feeling less than. But even if I have an orgasm from oral, I’d still want to be penetrated and would leave wanting more.***
I would assume it was psychological (performance anxiety), a new medication that affects erections, or the person is actually not that interested.
Based on the fact that you didn’t have a problem the first time, my assumption would be that you weren’t as interested in things as the first time and that interest was waning/should have been a one night stand.
I was tired from work once and went soft when my wife and I started to get intimate. We’ve been together for 11 years but she cried a little. We cuddled and I told he it was just work stuff the got in the way. It seemed to make her feel a little better.
I made it up to her the next day and We’ve been fine.
My point is that maybe your just a little off your game. Try going on a easy date day, go out to lunch, catch a movie, or sometimes a walk in the park is relaxing. Once you get home you can shower relax and maybe things will come together. Stress won’t help so do what’s easy. She obviously likes the things leading up to PIV so half the problem is solved.
Don’t over think it and communication is very important. Hope this helps.
They feel terrible, and it’s a slight ego boost in a sense that the girl really wants to please you but it’s very sad and it’s best to reassure them that they are fine and it’s not their fault, they kitty isn’t broken and they mouth ain’t dry
If a guy can’t finish because he’s exhausted, 🤷🏼♀️ it happens. If it continuously happened I would become concerned as to why.
Honestly if the man can’t finish I feel badly. I feel like it’s somehow my fault. It seems like you’re attracted to her. Are you physically fit? Is there some kind of mental block for you?
My husband struggles with erectile dysfunction. Honestly, how I feel about it depends on how he handles it. If he’s kind and accepting of his dysfunction, I am at ease and feel less unsettled. If he is frustrated and irritable about it, that makes me so stressed and upset. So, just try to handle it well and everything should be okay.
for me it’s not a big deal, it’s a part of life and you got her off several times so I’m sure she’s happy lol
It’s disappointing but I try not to take it personally. Guys get nervous and sometimes meds do that. I also get that trying to last long can sometimes backfire to not being able to finish at all. The best thing you can do is reassure your partner that the issue is not about them and it could also be helpful to talk together about what you can practically do to make things better for both of you.
Young guys and of course women do need to understand that guys any age can have an off night or seven once in a while. We aren’t always machines. And it doesn’t mean something major is wrong. Tired, stressed, work pressure, bills, alcohol, you know, a lot of the stuff that makes it tough for women to feel sexy sometimes
Many different medications can mess with your sensitivity, or threshold, whatever you wanna call it.
And this post is one that resonates because I last way too long, at least in my opinion.
I think the occasional more than 2 hours is way too long and I start running out of steam. So I am a little self conscious about it.
I get worried they think I’m not into them because I’m not climaxing. It can be really frustrating. So I’m hoping to also see the opinions
Edit: quit masturbating btw. I have to do that when I’m with someone so I can perform in a more timely manner. I mean that by relationship, if it’s hookup sex, which I rarely do, I hope for the best.
Try not to worry, women are humans too, we understand that it happens! Nerves, anxiety, excitement, they get to everyone! (Also me being me, I would keep in mind that my partner is 10 years older, so I definitely wouldn’t hold that against him) If she knows that she gives you an erection and you’re getting her off, I think you’ll be just fine!
I think that committed partners should hold space for each other in how their unique bodies climax in their own special way.
Go home relatively happy however there’d be concern about you – in a good way, not a judgemental way.
I didn’t squirt the first time I mounted my wife. I was kinda drunk and that’s always chancy for me to reach my klymaxx. She didn’t appear to be upset but I could tell it bothered her as she didn’t count the experience as our first time together. Now we’ve been married for 20 years and it happens sometimes but it’s no biggie. Happens to her too sometimes.
Usually irritated because I’m always like, “I’ll finish it tomorrow, babe.”
It depends on how much I like the guy
Wish I had this problem.
Honestly it wouldn’t probably make me feel insecure that it was something I had done that made you not so into it. If anything, you could just tell her why or reassure her. I mean she might not care, or think anything of it, or just assumed you had a bit of a nonconcordance moment (Which happens to everyone). But if you’re worried, just tell her that you don’t want her to think it’s her or anything.
I had that happen to me, turned out the guy was hopped on meth. So I kinda just wrote it off as that rather than anything I had done. I did stop fucking him after that. But it was more that he kept insisting I blow him to try to get him hard again. And I’m sorry, but trying to suck life into a completely soft penis for a loooong period of time is kinda rather unpleasant. And when he finally did get hard, he wanted me to ride. Which is fine. But we spent an hour of me sucking soft dick and then riding for 5 minutes. Suffice to say, I quite literally got nothing out of it and was kinda just grossed out and put off. If he’d had bothered to accept he wasn’t having it and still tried to make it enjoyable for me, I probably wouldn’t have given up on him as a sexual partner lol.
My wife of 16 years still remembers how I couldn’t keep up when we were trying to conceive… Multiple rounds a day, often in demand. This was 10yearsbahi and would you know she keeps reminding me of it when I “think I’m in a high libido state”. Now tho, sometimes I choose not to cum., Cause I don’t like to waste it . She is totally ok with it, cause she prefers none PIV stim. Not all women in my opinion would be concerned, but as with any great relationship short or long term you got to have open (bothway) communication! Will save you having this doubt you have.
I’ve been in a similar situation with a FWB and yeah I would be disappointed.
I might go with another guy next time. I mean if you were a romantic partner I would find my fulfillment with you other ways: Intimacy, sharing stories about our day, cuddling, long walks… But with a FWB I totally expect to be fucked and sent home with sex hair and my pussy beat up by your dick.
This is a problem for me because I enjoy basically every facet of sex *except* PIV. It has nothing to do with shame and anxiety. My body is just physically averse to it, it’s instinctually gross to me, so I can never get hard and stay hard. :/
Nah you’re good. Don’t worry about it too much. Women understand.
Stop masturbating. It will help if you lay off that
I’ll be honest: I know I shouldn’t take it personally because there can be other reasons (anxiety) but it makes me feel awful and puts me off sex for some time afterwards.
So I suffer from delayed ejaculation, meaning I don’t finish. Any regular partner I have had has always gotten sad after. And they all new before hand. I actually gave up on sex. Because I got tired of that sad look.
As a one off its no biggie, but if it’s happening again and again yeah it’d be deflating if be wondering if they didn’t find me attractive enough which would make me feel bad about myself
Woman does not cum=she is in the majority, no pressure
Man does not cum=woman thinks it’s her, man feels as if he has failed, woman feels as if she has failed.
Sometimes I feel as if there is a double standard.
Had this with an ex. She really didn’t like it and asked me if I was gay.
Honestly, I was so confused. I’d had some women love the fact that I could last all night. Pop culture told me the worst thing I could be as a lover was someone who came too quickly. I thought this was what they wanted.
Anyway, now I blow my load in 5 minutes like everyone else.
Honestly it just happens sometimes, dehydration and/or stress can really kill the lead in the pencil, also if you really like this person it could be performance anxiety, are things maybe getting serious with this person? I’ve had this happen a handful of times and only the most recent time I was fully ok with it. Meh. My wife was satisfied, she said so and was pretty loud lol it happens, move on, have a chat with her about it if you need to. Direct communication clears things up the easiest I find
There should never be a pressure on anyone to cum for the sex to have been good. Its just not fair. People can’t cum for various reasons and it’s complete normal.
Good sex doesn’t always mean orgasms. Enjoy the sex, don’t just do it for the big explosion at the end.
Sometimes oral orgasms are better than intercourse orgasms. Sometimes, after my man goes down on me and gets me off, and then he starts having sex with me, I tell him I already did so it’s all about him now, I don’t need to cum again. I wouldn’t worry about that part. Sometimes, guys can’t get it up, it happens. I don’t think she thinks it’s her fault and I doubt she’s mad or blames you. All of life’s stresses fucks with penises, don’t think to much about it next time, just let it happen.
You’re to in your head now, I’d say that’s the issue. I would still go home happy because you still had fun and got her to cum. If you had just given up and not done anything then that would be an issue.
I’d feel bad cuz I can’t get him off but usually theres a reason why most guys cant.
I always feel sad for him because I’ve had my own battles with sexual dysfunction and found it devastating. Logically I know that it’s not my fault and it could be caused by a bunch of different factors, and I know that if I show insecurity about it I will make the problem worse, but it’s still a sad situation because it makes me feel like I can’t do right by him
You are 37… It’s called erectile dysfunction. It happens to so much men that it’s one of the most advertised product on almost all sports radio stations. Same with nightly news stations.
37 and you are firmly in the old category. Sorry.
I know for men, especially our age, we are just starting to figure shit out and become successful. That’s what happens when you enter the job market right after the 08 financial collapse.
Sucks that you finally are peaking girl wise and you get erectile dysfunction. Maybe it;s a sign. DON’T FUCK THIS GIRL. SHE HAS THE GOLDEN SNATCH. SHE WILL RUIN YOUR LIFE. SHE WANTS YOUR MONEY AND YOUR HOUSE.
That would be a proper thing to happen to any of us. We finally are able to afford shit and bam, succubus comes and takes it all.
I don’t take many things as signs, but if this has never happened before, and she really is the hottest girl you have ever been with… .run. I dated this girl in HS, hottest girl in the school. Still one of the hottest women I have ever seen. Ya, nothing really will compare to having sex with her all the time (That and being in HS was SICK. I definitely peaked though, women wise)
Now I am 32 just got out of a 9 year relationship and I am not even looking for a women anymore. It’s just too much. Unless I hit it big and become instantly rich, I am not getting married and I am not having kids. I will spend my money how I want. Maybe take care of people already on this planet who need help.
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Rant over
Exact same here last year or so, I went soft on my current ladyfriend a couple of months ago. She dealt with it & brought it back to life in such a way I’ve never suffered again, in fact back with gusto. She’s a great lover & will make you feel safe that’s all I needed. Viagra will sort it for you but could give you mental reliance on it. Which isn’t good. Most of this is in your head and nervous system.
I feel sad, like I failed. Disappointed. Sometimes I fret over it the next or two like I lost my skill. So yes I enjoy myself during it but afterwards I feel kinda lame. Personally I need to hear it’s not me, i’m not broken, and it’s a you problem. Lots of compliments help
It really depends on the woman.
Some would be frustrated but others wouldn’t care at all.
It sounds like you did well to make sure she had a good time she likely she’s fine.
Nice. Get some viagra, sounds like you are aroused but not relaxed as she is the hottest woman and you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself. Viagra can be a great way to help you have functional sex and in my experience, I only need it for new partners.
This is the band aid approach. A long term fix could be to review why you think sex with someone gorgeous would be any different from someone who is considered average or even ugly. Just remember that she is choosing you over other options she probably has so don’t obsess too much over it.
I’m 38 but was having that issue at 35. I went and got my hormones checked and that was the issue. I got prescribed testosterone and a low dose cialis. 5MG a day is all you need. I’ve basically been a teenager the passed 3 years! Haha. High libido and a raging hard on! Maybe give it a shot. Hormones effect sex so bad