In general I’ve noticed I tend to meet significantly more attractive/well rounded women IRL through organic public interactions then the women I match with on tinder, bumble, hinge, etc. Like the women I match with on tinder either have it less together (personality-wise) or are significantly less attractive than the women I actually entertain/date IRL.
Any other guys experience the same? Kind of makes me not even want to bother with the apps.
2 comments
No I’m fucked for either one. Especially now that I’m fucking balding at 22. Zero fucking women show any interest in me now irl. I can take better pictures that make me look good and get matched on apps but I fucking fail to entertain them every time so they just ghost me. Must be nice to be a fucking woman and just have million matches and just be able to sort through which one entertains you the most when you have to contribute fucking nothing.
It’s hard to know if you could be attracted to someone just based on a dating profile. Sure, you could like the way they look, but attraction is about more than that. It’s about feeling like you can connect on a human level. In person, you can really get to know if you mesh with someone’s personality.
I myself am hoping that I can meet someone organically. I feel like it might be easier to connect with someone I meet, say through work or through some other activity that I frequent. It helps to have some prior experience to bond you together. I feel like in the past, a lot of the guys I met online might have not felt a connection with me because they had previously been in an intense relationship with a girl they knew in real life. For instance, one of my exes was in a relationship with this girl he met at grad school before he dated me. They had many of the same friends, they had some of the same classes/professors, they traveled the world together during their summer vacations, and they shared so many fun grad school experiences together. I didn’t have any of that with him, so I felt like he didn’t feel as connected to me. On top of it, we were long-distance from the get-go, so that made it hard for things to progress.
The problem with online dating is that it’s not sustainable if a person you’ve matched with isn’t willing to eventually integrate you into other parts of their life or if they’re not comfortable being integrated into parts of your life.