So at my college I went through a really dark period and hooked up with a couple girls, smoked pot, and hung out with strangers, to try and fill a void inside. I acted out and became a completely different person during the covid lockdown. I finally began to work on myself and fix my mental health problems but by the end of the year it was too late. Somebody anonymously claimed that I raped them or that I was a sexual predator. I don’t know who the claim came from but I’ve heard so many rumors spread about me it makes me question if everybody just hated me from the start. I’ve felt overwhelmed beyond belief, and it sucks because I’ve worked tremendously hard to fix my mental health. But nobody seems to care, I’m just a “rapist” to people, regardless of whether it’s true or not. I don’t even know what’s true anymore. Is there a way to fix my reputation? I’m tired of being so lonely and hated by the world.
11 comments
My condolences man. There’s nothing you can do.
We live in a post MeToo, “Believe All Women” world.
You can take this to court, be found innocent beyond a shadow of a doubt, and still be guilty in the court of public opinion. “They didn’t look hard enough for the evidence” after all. Look at Brett Kavanaugh.
This is a tough one – because the “noise” is already loud and out there. But let me say this (as a woman) I can’t speak on what you did/didn’t do, but you admit you weren’t acting right, so it is what it is. Whether you worked everyday on your mental health and became a brand new person (or not) doesn’t change that whatever may have happened – happened. I’m sorry. This comes down to people perception…and that can be very hard to change!
A reputation as something as vile as a “rapist” can’t be undone. It just can’t. Because in someone’s mind you will always be that predator…so all you can do is either change locations, move, etc – or learn to ignore the noise and keep bettering yourself as you have been.
Hassle Free Zone, David Icke –
https://youtu.be/rSj5tST9YEE
Yeah, you’re honestly fucked dude. Your rep among these people will ALWAYS be that you’re a rapist.
It’s screwed up, but it’s true.
perceptions can change, Johnny Depp & Amber Heard
If it makes you feel better, it’s just a reputation. You’ll never spend a day in jail, have charges pressed, lose out on… well, much of anything. Worst case: people don’t wanna be your friend or party with you.
Now, that being said: if you “don’t know what’s true”, that’s a big red flag… I hope you’re still going to therapy. I think you should talk to them about it. Because if you think you could have crossed a line, and you don’t remember/don’t know, it’s best to operate as if you did.
Think it’s time for a fresh start and move somewhere, if not you’ll forever live like this
Ah yes, I’m sure all this just came about out of nowhere and for no reason. You’re obviously the victim, so sorry.
A fresh start in a new place will do incredible things for you.
I’d find out who started it and try to sway them into changing the reputation. It has to be a bitter Ex or some dumb girl who regretted it. I’d talk to them not in a aggressive way but, in a way trying to understand why they would do that and then once you know why change her mind.if it’s a completely unreasonable girl then her behavior will say more about her then your rumor will about you. I’d make it a point to show I’m not what they say so she’d look like the liar.
So did you do it or not?