State that, sorry, english is not my native language and at the end of post **TW: talk about child sexual act**
Hello everyone, I am looking for advice regarding fantasies over r*pe.
I am 20m and I must state that no, fantasies are not intended for other people, I have no fantasy or anything and everything remotely similar to sexual assault of others. I would never do such sick thing to anyone. The fantasies are on me…
I am not happy to fantasize about it, I hate it and it feels so bad. I have this fantasy but I never searched up for non con because as much as it can turn on I never wanted to fuel it. I mostly watch porn and then imagine stuff on my own. Lmao.
I am gay but when it comes to porn I watch anything honestly and fantasy sometimes is also on the act perpetrated by women
I know that non con exists but I don’t think i am into it because to me this is just a fantasy…I am too scared to have non con in real life but I want to get it off my head definitely. I hate to think of it and of the actual victims of sexual assault this is just not ok …
What could I do ? I thought of avoid porn for a bit but honestly I don’t think I over use it? It’s one time per day usually, sometimes 2. I thought it could be because of absence of sex life too.
Though when I was 8 or 9 years old my 12/13y cousin performed sexual acts on me (there was penetration and blew me off..) but at the time I did not do much to stop it and I don’t think I was either that bothered (I don’t think I understood really what was going on though/ was wrong) …. now a bit of shame but I have no trauma or something. I don’t think this fantasy is because of this… I think I am just this way, even if there was not this accident in my life i’d still be like this
Any advice ? Thank you
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