How to offer my daughter a place to stay

Hello folks, I’m looking for a way to talk to my daughter. First, an explanation why.

So I have two daughters, one going into her senior year in high school, the other a few years older. Her mother and stepfather make significantly less than I do per year and have been struggling financially for a while. I have, and continue, to pay my monthly child support every month (it comes out to about $250 per week, or the equivalent of 35 hours a week at minimum wage in the state she lives in, without any taxes). I’ll explain why I mention this in a moment.

So today my daughter came down after a bit of break, and my current wife and I have noticed that the only time she comes down anymore is when we offer to do all of the driving – it’s a 3-3.5 hour trip in each direction, and traditionally myself and my ex would meet halfway. Lately, though, she hasn’t been able to do so. When my wife and daughter got here, my wife let me know what they discussed while driving – that her mother had recently quit another job (she seems to go through 2-3 per year), that her stepfather works some during the night shift, but we don’t believe it’s full-time, and that now, my eldest daughter and her boyfriend have both moved in with them. Neither my eldest, nor her boyfriend, have jobs, and historically my eldest struggles to find and hold employment. I think part of the reason we haven’t seen her in a bit, except when I drive up there, is because of their finances. This is causing me to worry about two things: first, I know my youngest daughter often felt overwhelmed when her older sister used to live with them, and as I understand it, this is not a large apartment they all share. So adding back the sister, plus another adult, must be putting pressure on the living situation. Second, I’m worried about the finances. The only sources of income I know of are the husband’s part-time work and my child support, and that was already a strain on this household before adding in two additional mouths to feed. It crushes my heart sometimes to hear my daughter talk about certain things as being expensive – things like snacks for lunches, granola bars, etc, and I really worry for her. I don’t think she should have to be so self-conscious of cost restraints, and worrying about what foods are “expensive” vs others. I know what struggling financially is like, I grew up in a very blue-collar household, and it seems they are currently worse off than my parents had been. My ex has been evicted from an apartment before, so I know it’s in the realm of possibility and I worry that this extra financial pressure really will push her over the edge.

I have always told my kids in the past they are welcome to come and live here anytime they want. But now I’m worried. I want to offer for my daughter to move down here, and she can finish high school in my city if things get bad up there. I just don’t know how to say it to her delicately. I want to let her know that if things get bad up there, she has a place where she can focus on just finishing her studies (and living here past high school, I’m not worried about that) and that I’ll support her in terms of both being able to see her friends in her old school when we can (her significant other and best friend are both in separate states and she communicates with them mostly online) as well as her mother and sister.

How can I put this to her? I don’t want to embarrass her by discussing the financial situation at her mom’s house, and I know she has friends up there as well as her family, so I’m cognizant of this. I just don’t know how she can focus on her studies when she’s worried about every penny being spent, and her mom may not be paying the rent, AND she’s got two additional people with her. I know her mother won’t support the idea – I am long past being able to convince her to do anything I think is best for our daughters, and her identity is bound up in the concept she is the better parent because she has custody. So how do I talk to my seventeen-year-old about this?

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\*\*TL;DR;\*\* : Ex-wife is struggling financially, and I want advice on how to tell my 17 y.o. she can live here without embarrassing her, in a way she’ll take it as a serious offer.