TL:DR: girl has crush on my friend, I want to be platonic friends, but I feel like she only likes to hang with me to get close with my buddy, even tho she says she really likes hanging with me. I want to have an honest convo about what’s up, but those have only scared ppl off or brought lies to make me believe nothings going on. What should I do?
I have a new friend that I’m trying to get to know cuz she’s fun to be around and I thought she was easy going and honest, but I feel like there’s something beneath the surface, that makes me feel something is wrong. My first guess is she only wants to be friends with me to get close to my best friend cuz she may have feelings for him
She talks about my best friend pretty and is all over him physically, touching him at any opportunity
We used to text a lot, I liked it, she used to initiate texts a lot and respond in an instant everytime (I don’t expect that of her, she just did it), but after we hung out 1 on 1 she has started ghosting me at weird points. It’s strange cuz after we hung out she asked me to extend the hang out, but I didn’t cuz I was tired AND after the hang out she texts my best friend “I’m so happy I hung out with sgb1446, he so funny”.
The ghosting is weird cuz we’ll be having a convo and in the middle she’ll just leave me on read and not acknowledge what I said. That part’s alright, but we had plans on Sunday to try out my new raft and I asked if she was still coming 2 days before rafting, she left me on read then. I figured she just didn’t wanna go so I left her alone, but then when I got home from rafting she texted “so when can we go on your yacht”, the yacht part is a reference to my snap story that included my best friend.
My response was “I’m gonna have to get back to you about rafting, I don’t know when I’ll be free”. The next day I told her I can raft Wednesday, and that I invited my best friend, but idk if he can come, no promises. She said she can’t that day, I asked when she can and she left me on read. It’s like, you asked when can we go, why are you acting like you don’t wanna go
I feel like there’s something odd, like she doesn’t actually like me for me and she just wants to get close to my best friend, I don’t like feeling used. I want to have an honest convo to see what’s up, but those have never worked, ppl either lie and say everything is fine, they’re not playing a game (but it always comes out they are), or they just exit the friendship.
I need new friends and she’s fun to hang out with, which is why I want this to work