Like I remember I could easily get around my way with people I used to like but now I have such a hard time socializing with them like I lose interest so easily, some of my friends also went through the same they all say you’ll get through it, it’s gonna be okay and all but my question is how do people lose interest in communication after coming out of a serious relationship when they need it the most ?
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because you didnt practice for all those years, thats why monogamy sucks
You’re not used to dealing with unknowns.
The game has changed. If you’re used to one-night stands commonly, and now you’re not getting any… your style may be whack and need changing or updating
Cause you haven’t played the game in a long ass time.
The game has changed and you haven’t been practicing for a long time. Practice makes perfect.
It’s all about the timing. She’s gonna go fuck someone new as soon as you get lazy. So it seems like you lose your game but really you’re just down and out already and she drops separation right on top of you.
Being out of the game is a factor, sure… but I think it has more to do with fear and “lesson learned.”
We might recognize that “fire hot! Fire bad!” But until we actually get burned, we’ll continue jumping over the top of it, using our hands to move that one log that’s sticking out a bit, laughing as we grab someone’s shoulders and give them a jostle near the fire while claiming we just “saved your life…” you get the idea, right?
But talk to someone who’s suffered 2nd or 3rd degree burns… they’ll stand so far away from that fire, it might as well not exist.
We drive more carefully after a car accident. We stay on the ground after big fall. We avoid a food after getting sick. And we “lose our game” after a heartbreak.
Practice makes perfect.
No practice? Game goes down. 🗑️🚮
Because you haven’t been using it…if you were faithful.
You got used to dealing with a single woman’s nonsense. Now you’re trying to deal with the nonsense of many women.
When we lose someone we really loved and it’s not our fault but there’s for our breakup then we lose apart of ourselves too. Some of us are not used to opening Pandora’s box
Being sad. Missing someone m your whole life chagrin.
Most people let themselves go while in a relationship and end up looking not so good when they get dumped. Throw in being jaded and it’s really a tough slog to get back into dating. I highly recommend being kind to your body, have a positive mindset and never chase girls. If you are well kept and have a job and place, they will literally line up for you. Most women think men are like their fathers… you know the ones that marry and provide for toxic women that become mothers… so they think they can do this to all males. Do not lower your standards nor take crap from mediocre girls with bad attitudes and personalities. There are wonderful girls out there. Just need to sort through the ocean of average females out there.
Being in a relationship can slowly whittle away your ego and even your personality over time. When you come out the other end, you sometimes end up a shell of your former self, without your charisma and sociability.
Because you didn’t use it while in a relationship.
Simple questions deserve simple answers.
Lack of practice and pussy whipped.
I think a lot of reasons and depends on what exactly you mean. Do you mean communication to anyone? Or do you mean dating/flirting with women?
My guess is, maybe you aren’t interested in dating right now. Still going through the emotions of the break up. Maybe if was really good and you aren’t over her.
Maybe the relationship was toxic and you just want to be single/avoid that type of stuff for now, like lessons learned.
Maybe after dating someone you really cared about, you know more of what you are looking for or are looking for something deeper and you are losing interest quickly because you know they don’t do it for you.
Rust and the game evolving
After a break up with a very long term partner , we gotta process it and mourn it properly.
Eat right, hit the gym, let yourself deal. Youl be good to go in no time
Because everybody needs a rest period.
Some people are good to go after a week of crying into their pillow. Others might take years.
You’re used to having intimate conversations with your SO and now regular, superficial social interactions are unsatisfying.
This is a big problem for men especially because we rely on our significant others for all of our intimacy and when she’s not there, we’re lost. So… try to get closer with your friends? Or just wait and maybe you’ll forget how valuable having deep connections is.
The term “Game” is BS, there’s no such thing. It’s your ability to stay present that’s stopping interactions with the OS. There’s a good chance you might have unresolved resentment that you might have to get therapy for. Going to therapy will help a lot with fine tuning your people skills and open up new doors for dating. I can say this from experience.
Loosing curiosity overtime takes a toll on our ability to create and nurture new relations.
If that person is not over you, and you are not over them you shouldn’t punish true love or kill it with things that are not needed. In this evil world good things are a rare find my friend.
I feel this. I got out of a 4y &10m relationship almost a year ago and finally got a 1st date last week. I’ve never had much game to begin with and damn its rough.
It’s cause you got fat
Bold of you to assume that I had enough game to begin with
Most of the answers here are total bullshit. Like you forgot how to play, or you lost shape, etc. Women have more empathy than men. They feel you’re not stable and enthusiastic inside of you on emotional level. Women are heavily attracted to dedicated, passionate, self confident men. You just exited a long term relationship. You’re currently the opposite.
The way to go is to start feeling free and happy by yourself. At that point they’ll come at you again.
A “serious” relationship is one in which you are emotionally invested. When you lose that relationship, you must grieve its loss, and for a time you are emotionally numb.
You can try to avoid experiencing that grief – even successfully – for a while, but until you let yourself grieve, you will find it hard to connect emotionally with others. The process takes time, the grief passes, you heal, and then you can form that sort of connection with someone else.
If you were with that person for a long time, you will grieve the loss of your lover, the loss of a companion, and the loss of a friend. This is why deeper relationships take longer to recover from.
This is what “losing your game” is really about.
Its because your heart isn’t in it bud. You just got away from someone you thought was gunna be it. Women go through the same thing just process it differently. He’ll we all process it differently. Your heart considers it a loss. Nothing to do but wait for your heart and mind to be ready again and its gunna take time and practice. You were focused on one person and their interests, hobbies, and operated on their time scale and their emotional patterns. Your heart, mind, and soul gotta get the repairs outta the way before your gunna start operating like you thought you would.
Not just that think about what you have learned from that! You are gunna grow from every failure and every misstep dude. You gotta be ready to look at things different because they are now different for you. Your out of something serious that took time and emotional bars. You gotta fill those bars, adjust fire, and watch your lane! Military saying for “hey its cool you gotta just get your sights back on target its all good dude”.
Are your friends trying to help. Yep they might have been down that road too. Think about the death of a family member right. That shit sucks really bad. Your heart thinks that person is essentially not reachable anymore … kinda like a death… so there is no easy fix and there is no just getting ready to be single and mingle. Its all a plight and play to get your attempting to get into the saddle again. Take your time, recover and learn dude. Your next partner will greatly appreciate that you emotionally have grown.
Because those are skills that you use and being in a serious relationship people tend to stop using them because they’ve already achieved their goal of getting into a relationship.
Then there is the fact that after being in a relationship you realize that a lot of stuff that people do when socializing is just pointless bs that people do to try to sell themselves to others.
Because the life force in us has been sucked out and drained as well as our wallets.
Relationship game and early dating game are absolutley not the same thing. Maintaining a relationship is a whole other skillset from sparking initial attraction and interest. You need to get back to the latter.
Social skills require practice and you’re out of practice.
Dating and trying to date are different
For me personally it was 100% depression. On some level I thought I should be pursuing new women but when push came to shove I didn’t have the mental energy to.
I don’t know how I’d be able to function if I lost my wife. I think that any woman I met, I would automatically compare to her in my mind. And I would expect her to talk to me the way my wife did. I’d probably be completely hopeless.
I never had game to begin with so going from a long term relationship to single really crippled me. To top it off, staying inside all the time during covid made me even more antisocial than I already was. Now with how weird the dating game has become where 2nd chances are nonexistent and saying a single wrong thing can leave you ghosted? I don’t know about other people but I haven’t got a shot in hell.
Basically It’s survival instinct. Why put ourselves through that shit again.
Subconsciously we wonder why fish in a sea of bitches, do we doubt ourselves? Do we wonder if we are good enough? Is there actually somebody out there worth our energy or are we doomed to repeat the same thing over and over so why bother?
Find happiness in yourself and don’t rely on some chick to be happy. Be content in you and in time find that someone special, or at least in the end, you won’t be disappointed