Is it disingenuous to act ditzy as a first impression?

5 comments

1. Is it disingenuous that your first instinct, when meeting a person, is to put on a front to test them? Yes. I think you should ask yourself why you’re doing this?

   As an armchair observer, it sounds like insecure behavior, born from trust issues. Granted, it’s ok to be not completely forthcoming, but it’s the manipulation to illicit a particular behavior that seems so disingenuous to me.

2. The problem is that many people act on their first impressions of a person, and those first impressions are very hard to change.

   So what you will do with this is filter out the kinds of people who you want to get to know, because they will not be interested in spending time with a person who they believe is “as dumb as a sack of rocks”

   Also it is based on the assumption that a majority of people who you encounter are wanting to take advantage of you. With this assumption, and having filtered out the intelligent people, you are going to find yourself correct a lot more often than you want to.

3. It sounds like you’re self sabotaging. There may have been opportunities for great relationships that got a pass because they didn’t like the front you put on, and said nope, but could have liked the real you.

4. You sound beyond obnoxious. Your first reaction to meeting someone is lie about who you are? How do you even make friends?

5. Yeah.

   But is that bad?

   I get the impression people on this sub expect people to be perfect.

   “Omg, do you mean you lied?”

   Yeah, I lie all the time. I also love to be lazy. Most people would never guess how bad my temper actually is. I am , in fact, human.

   As long as you arent doing anything too bad it is okay to have a little darkness inside.