How does one become good in bed? Do you need to be physically fit to be considered good at sex?

16 comments

1. Lots of practice.

2. Enthusiasm.

3. Fitness is a biggie, yeah. Don’t want to be passing out after 5 minutes.

   Confidence in your own abilities is the next, if you think you aren’t a good lover, you never will be.

   Practice, not everything works with everyone, especially with women, what gets me off might not another woman and vice versa.

4. Its sensual and spiritual. You can feel it your bodies movements. When you have a connection you’ll know it.

5. As with anything when dealing with someone else, Communication

6. Communication and connection helps a lot . Fitness helps with endurance and mood but it doesn’t make you experience it just makes you ready to have sex at all times which is nice because your not struggling to get your partner up , that happens and it can get exhausting.

7. – Create an environment where your partner feels safe communicating with you honestly about their wants and needs and how you’re doing
   – Receive their feedback, *understand* their feedback (when they say “harder” they don’t mean faster, when they say “don’t stop” they don’t mean do something totally different than exactly what you were doing that caused them to say “don’t stop”, etc etc) and put their feedback into practice
   – Check in to make adjustment

   That’s it. There’s no special trick or routine that works magic, you just have to ensure your partner is able to communicate with you, and then you use their communication to do what they want/need. Every partner is going to be different

8. Not only is communication, creativity, and chemistry important but yea I’d say fitness does play a huge factor.

   I couldn’t become a rodeo queen until I started doing regular daily cardio, nothing excessive just a good light jog or power walk for maybe 45 mins a day did a huge difference. Wait till I start weight training 😂

9. Trial and error. Communication. You’ll gain a feel for things.

10. I’m sure for some people fitness will be a requirement. But people have such varied preferences, that it won’t be the same for everyone.

    For example, I don’t enjoy PIV to last longer than around ten minutes. I don’t think anyone needs to be an athlete to have sex for ten minutes, so for me major physical fitness is not a requirement. For me, if someone is good at reading my body language and my moans, and loves performing cunnilingus then I’m likely to think they’re good in bed.

11. [removed]

12. I think it’s mainly enthusiasm and confidence.

    But being physically fit (which already improves confidence), also can benefit sex too since your general stamina, flexibility, endurance, etc.. is better to do more in general.

13. You get good at sex by practicing 😝

14. For me it was letting go of the control I wanted to have. I allowed myself to feel and enjoy every aspect.

    I’m usually the giver in foreplay. I lick every inch of him, and I become hot and bothered instantly.

    I’m not good at keeping rhythm, so I go with his trusts and that seems to do the job.

    Last, I became a cuddler because he asked for it, and I now enjoy it.

15. I wouldn’t have thought fitness made any difference? I’ve never even considered it. All that matters to me is that the guy knows how to please me and really cares about pleasing me, and shows me how to please him, without ever being disrespectful in any way.

16. Doing things out of one’s own enjoyment, interest, and pleasure. That energy will be felt by the partner and will ignite the couple’s shared experience