This guy I met online, said to me that he wants to meet often and go into a relationship after knowing each other. We hooked up on the first date and he ejaculated in me without my consent. I told him I am Not ready for a fwb situation. We hooked up a second time and he asked me ‘why don’t you shave?’ Is this guy going to be in a relationship with me after all, is it ok for me to feel uncomfortable with him wanting me to shave as shaving is a personal choice and I had done it once and didn’t feel too great.

28 comments

  1. There are so many red flags here. Why would you even *consider* another date with this guy, much less a relationship

  2. I would not continue to talk to this person since they have literally went against your consent and violated your body already, clearly they don’t care about your feelings and boundaries and that’s a massive 🚩 I would run literally.

  3. Try asking yourself if you even know this guy enough to consider a relationship with him. And yes, it’s ok for you to feel uncomfortable with him altogether—this guy doesn’t even know you.

  4. >We hooked up on the first date and he ejaculated in me without my consent.

    Hi. That’s sexual assault. You have much bigger problems with this guy than shaving. Break things off with this guy immediately.

  6. Sounds like lots of red flags. Some people like hair, others don’t. Just find someone who gets you.

  7. This guy does not respect you or your bodily autonomy. You’ve been on one date and he’s already violated you physically and tried to get you to change your body for him. It’s only going to get worse from here. Don’t get into a relationship with him.

  9. A vital skill for you to cultivate is recognizing red flags and responding appropriately. In most cases that means running like hell

  10. Ejaculating inside of you and not using condoms your first time having sex is definitely way bigger than simply asking why you don’t shave or requesting that you do.

    Of course, you also have a responsibility for allowing sex to continue despite no condoms being in play. Just like you also have a responsibility for continuing to hook up with him after you told him you weren’t ready for FWBs.

  11. Um.

    Did you tell him not to cum in you and he did anyway?

    Never see him again

    And a man can request you shaving. You dont have to comply. He can choose to not keep seeing you.

  12. Legally you can set his ass on fire in court if you decide. Why would you want to be in a relationship with a man who sexually assaulted you?
    No means no.

  13. So you met a guy and he nutted in you without consent.

    And your question is about shaving?

    I mean, if you want a future with this man, and this is an easy way to please him. Then sure. Do it if you want.

    But like….. I’d run.

  15. It looks like you already ended things, but just want to add – I was casually hooking up with a guy and stopped seeing him after he told me to shave.

    I just saw in a comment that this guy fucked you without a condom without you knowing. The other commenters who said this is called stealthing are right, and they’re also right that it’s sexual assault. Please know your feelings of being violated are completely valid (and accurate). Please take care of yourself:

    https://sexualhealthalliance.com/nymphomedia-blog/stealthing-is-it-illegal-what-if-it-happens-to-you

  17. I’m confused, why do yout hink him wanting you to shave means you’re gping to be in a relationship? Also him ejaculated inside your ithput your consent is considered assault, but at the bare minimum you need to drop this dude. I mean unless sypu have 0 self respect

  18. Red flag 🚩 galore.

    I knew a guy that once told me he doesn’t even want me shaving and says I should use veet/nair. Everytime before we hook up. And I’m like naaaahhh.

    Don’t give this guy your time and energy , he’s not someone you want to be in a relationship with trust me. 🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️

  19. did you talk about him not ejaculating in you before sex or ever? If you can’t have these easy conversations than how can you have others? You have responsibility to say what you want to happen. Any decent guy will respect.

    Sometimes is hard to empathize. Women complain all that time that sex doesn’t meet thier expectations. You literally are the only one in power here. A guy will do anything you ask. I wish women were educated about that this is the one place they literally hold all the power. It is true! I think it’s also natural as you hold the key to reproducing. A guy can’t get rid of a pregnancy he doesn’t want, only women can. So she gets to say what goes and doesn’t go. Any guy is lucky to be near her. Own your power and say what you want.

    On the note about hair, screw him. If you want to, do, if you don’t want to he can find someone else.

  20. It is a personal choice and he can have a preference but you should never feel pressured into shaving. If it didn’t feel great then don’t do it again. You don’t want to be in a relationship with someone who make you feel uncomfortable about something that’s a personal choice. I would recommend taking things a bit slower to see this guys true colors. The last thing you want is to get into a relationship just to find out you don’t actually like how this guy acts.

  22. Red…. Flag…. this has potential to be extremely dangerous… do not go back…

  24. He didn’t ask you to shave, he asked why you don’t. Go ahead and answer that question.

  26. This is crazyyyyyyy😭 happy you ended things with that dude because he’s out of his mind for multiple reasons

  27. Him finishing inside without consent is an automatic NO. Shaving is the least of your concerns RUN LIKE HELL

  28. “He ejaculated in me without my consent”
    That’s all you need to know. Do not proceed.

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like