Curious as to what you define as a promiscuous past? A lot of friends in the dating game expect to hook up after only a couple of dates, so it seems like those numbers tally up quickly.

43 comments

  2. Guys are all different. Some guys don’t care at all, some will say 3, some will say 50, some will demand virgins only.

  3. I personally don’t know what my limit is. I’ve got a relatively high number apparently, and since i contribute to it, I cant really look down at others for it, you know?

    I’m sure theres a number? 200? 300? IDK. At some point it would give me the shivers

  7. Could not give less of a shit. Honestly, I think it’s bad form to give any shits about it.

  9. Personally I do not care as long as she is clean but I probably would not marry a woman that has been fucking a ton of guys in the past 5 years or so.

    Also hookup culture is not real.

  10. The numbers aren’t going to tally up quickly if you are loyal to a guy, just saying. That’s where the promiscuity problem arises. Fucking one guy, having unhealthy standards and expectations of men, jumping ship to another the moment the slightest of issues arise rather than handling it like a mature adult and realizing nobody is flawless.

  13. There is no hard and fast rule in this regard and everyone is different. I have had sex with 20 women, with my wife of course being the last (together almost 30 years so far). I met her when 24 years old. I lost my virginity at 17 and dated my first girlfriend 2 years, so really I had sex with 18 women in my “slutty” phase between ages 19 and 24. So, 17 in 5 years. There were other medium length relationships in there too, so when I was single it racked up fairly quickly.

    With all that being said, I do think that having longer term relationships thrown in makes a difference. So, if I dated someone and they said they had sex with 100 men, I’d be wondering if all this happened extremely quickly (red flag), or if they never had any long term relationships (red flag). If you had sex with one new person a month, that’s 12 per year. If it’s one a week, that’s 52 per year. Geesh, now I’m overthinking it.

    How about we just say it depends, but over 100 and I’d have to consider it.

  14. Hooking up with random people, having FWBs, multiple relationships a year for multiple years, etc. Basically just treating sex very casually and moving from one person to the next. Do whatever you want, but that indicates their values aren’t aligned with mine.

  15. I’m 19. A woman my age who’s fucked more than 1 or maybeee 2 guys is a resounding no for me lmao

  17. There was a Supreme Court case regarding obscenity where Justice Potter Stewart said “I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material I understand to be embraced within that shorthand description [“hard-core pornography”], and perhaps I could never succeed in intelligibly doing so. **But I know it when I see it,** and the motion picture involved in this case is not that.”

    That’s sort of how I determine if someone’s past is a bit rich for my blood. I honestly don’t know if it would bother me (my wife and I both have relatively modest pasts). I think anything that shows me their sexual values don’t align with mine would be a dealbreaker.

  19. My body count is 54, my wife’s is 6. I’d say over 20 I’d be like woah, which is how I feel about my own past.

  20. Gonna get downvoted, but MY OPINION is anything above 4. I personally won’t commit to a girl if she has more body’s then that

  24. Tbh I think a woman with even like 15+ past sexual partners can be considered not promiscuous if those partners were all loving, dedicated relationships. Though that would probably be an older woman at that point

  26. I don’t even have a real concept of promiscuity as a behavior or lifestyle anymore. Back when I was young enough to still be under the mental shackles of my religious upbringing I did; but now that I’m almost 40, somebody’s “body count” doesn’t even come up as a curiosity to me, regardless of how young they might be. It tells me nothing useful with any reliability.

    I’m more interested in the person underlying that output behavior, if that makes sense? But my views on monogamy in general tend to put me on the outlier side of questions like this, anyway.

  27. If she freely admits all the weird kinky shit she’s done with other guys before the 3rd date, it’s probably gonna be weird.

  28. It’s weird. Because most of my friends say they always get a kiss on the first date and have sex around the 3rd or 4th date. And when I think about it, when I’m single that’s true for me too. So we know the men’s numbers are crazy. But I’m sure women go on way more dates. So the numbers are probably ridiculous. How many men has a 30 year old women who’s been single for 3-5 years slept with? They probably can’t even keep up with the number. Never mind a single college student, male or female. It’s all wild. I’m 36 and I have to be in 40’s and I’ve been in 3 long term over 4 year relationships. The math is crazy to think about.

  30. I don’t have a standard for promiscuity because it’s not a thing I worry about.

    I prefer to fuck women who are good at sex. That doesn’t happen without fucking.

  33. A history of sex outside long term committed relationships (FWB, ONS, hookups, STR’s, flings) and/or a body count over 9, no matter of age.

  35. There’s tons of symptoms of promiscuity so it’s usually easier to filter women based on those.

    If she looks sexually available even when she’s not, chases attention from men, has trouble respecting boundaries or likes to argue, has lots of male friends, thinks dating multiple people at once is okay, spends too much time on social media, likes drugs or alcohol, lots of unhealed trauma, a generally negative opinion of men, odds are she’s got a promiscuous past. And the odds are it will haunt you, so it’s better to hit and quit.

    But that’s just my experience and my opinion.

  37. Body count isn’t a big a deal as the context of the hook ups. Like if we’re talking about a lot of next bf’s then no big deal. A few hook ups here and there, ok. If it’s multiple people in a month then it’s a bit much.

  38. Actin a ho. It’s not complicated, if she actin a ho she a ho. If he actin a ho he a ho.

  39. I’m 40+ and for me at 30y bodycount of 3 would be acceptable. I am fully aware how unreal it is 🙂

  40. for me isn’t a lot about NUMBERS . but more like ” she has 30 yo and NEVER had a boyfriend for more than 1 year”. i mean… something WITH HER isn’t relationship material or vibes.

  41. Most of the women I date are 30-35, so I’d say over 12 is promiscuous.

    If a woman has a more promiscuous past, I’m not going to disregard her from a serious relationship or pressure her for sex, but if she wants to wait around to fuck then I won’t bother with her.

  42. I’m a female and 30. My number is 10. My husband’s number is HIGH. Like, HIIIIGH. He was a traveling musician before we met and was crazy promiscuous. I asked him why that was even a thing because I was put of guard by that and grossed out and he said “I was trying to fill a void. I was lonely and thought that sex would help. But really it just made it worse” (I already made the “filling a void” joke to him BTW)
    But,
    we are madly in love and are married now. Been together 9 years. We are two of the most loyal people out there. People do change and body count is irrelevant once you fall in love. Someone’s worth is not measured by poor decisions they’ve made in the past and people do change. I found happiness from someone I claimed I’d never give a chance to and I can safely say that I’m one of the lucky ones.

  43. If she is still dripping from the last guy, that would be a no. But unless your the first you will always be second to somebody.

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