Hi everyone! I’m a bit curious about how many of you guys on here have personally gotten back together with an ex that you eventually ended up getting married to OR if you’ve heard of situations like this?
My (25F) ex (29M) & I are considering trying again at our relationship. To keep things brief as possible the reason it ended was because he left to study abroad (after being together for 3 years), he thought he would have been there for 5 years & didn’t think he could handle a LDR so he decided he wanted to break up.
1 year in & he has been sent back to his home country unfortunately, due to the loss of financing for his uni abroad.
After 1 year of me trying to personally heal & move forward & on, I never thought he would actually be back so soon like he is. Now I’m a bit confused & honestly I don’t know how to feel about it all since for the past year I had been working through alot of heavy emotions & feelings. From feeling like I was a pitstop to feeling discarded & everything in between.
My ex says he never stopped loving & caring for me & despite the heartbreak I was under I also never stopped loving & caring for him. This is also part of why we couldn’t stay friends when he left, too many boundaries were being crossed on either sides. I’m currently very cautious & protective of my heart & self because I don’t want to be hurt like that again by him.
For now we agreed to a sort of situationship I guess? Where we’re friends but still very close & intimate with each other. I suggested we speak & spend some time with each other to work through what happened in the last year instead of jumping straight back into a relationship. Part of this is because I am concerned that my ex is mentally & emotionally dealing with very heavy emotions from him being sent back to his home country & I just feel as though he needs the space to settle in & mentally & emotionally be ready for a relationship again.
In the end I feel like it is possible for us to rekindle & work things out but I just thought I would ask on here if anyone went through something similar & successfully went on to live life together with a once ex now as their partner again?
TL;DR: Any successful relationships where exes get back together & go onto building a life together?
1 comment
My now husband was my ex for 1.5 years.
We started out long distance for 3.5 years. I then broke up with him, for a few reasons, but I guess the main one was that I went on holiday to visit him for a few months and there was very little physical intimacy. He was very stressed from his job at the time, but I felt like he was wasting what little opportunity we had to be intimate together.
Another main reason is that up until that point I had never been with anyone else. He had been with at least 8 other people (he is 8 years older) and I felt like I needed to experience what it was like being with someone else too.
After I had another relationship and 1.5 years had passed, I was missing him a lot. I messaged him again and we ended up getting back together.
I always felt bad that I had broken up with him to have a relationship with someone else, but later on I did find out that he had cheated on me 3 months into our relationship when he had gotten very drunk at a party. It was a one night stand and an isolated incident, and he deeply regrets it.
We have now come to the mutual understanding that we both did bad things in the past, but we shouldn’t let it determine our future.
We have now been back together for 5 – 6 years and we have 2 kids together. We are also married and very happy together.
We have no issues trusting one another despite our past, and If anything we both feel more secure in our relationship because we’ve “been there done that” and neither of us wants to feel that regret again.
Hope my story helps. I know my relationship is far from conventional but the important thing is that we’re happy.