I (24F) have been feeling really insecure and anxious about my relationship with my BF (30M) of about 9 months. These last two months lots of things have been happening. He switched jobs and was traveling more and was getting ready to move at the same time.
But I can’t help feeling really anxious about our sex life. The frequency in which we have sex has gone down from 5 times or more a week. To once a week max. Also there have been more times recently where even if we do have sex he isn’t able to finish at all. This is starting to really freak me out. Does he no longer find me attractive? Is there someone else? Or am I overthinking it and it’s really just that a lot has been going on recently?
Sex is really important and needed for me in a romantic relationship and this is something that I had communicated to him really early on in us dating. But recently whenever I express disappointment in us not having sex, or try to talk about why the frequency has gone down. He seems to get frustrated with me and say that I’m pressuring him. So I’ve tried to initiate more but I get turned down more often then not. I am kinda at a loss on how to bring this up in a way that doesn’t put it all on him or make him anxious or frustrated.
TL:DR – Is this drop in the frequency me and my BF have sex normal? Or should I be concerned?
1 comment
Talk to him. If he travels a lot for work, he might be exhausted too much for sex. Don’t pressure him, just ask him how he’s doing and what’s going on and how he feels in your relationship overall.
Tell him you’d like some quality time together, and ask him to show you attention in other ways when he travels, like video calls, or getting you a small gift like snacks, etc.