Off the bat, this is a burner account just because this is embarrassing (personally) and something uncomfortable for me that I don’t like to talk about. I also don’t know if I’m technically allowed to be here since I’m 16 but I need help. So I’m 16, a virgin. I’m also trans ftm on HRt so like, I don’t know if this could be a reason. But anyways, I’ve tried for a long time to put something inside and it just hurts so badly. It doesn’t even go in and I feel like I’ve tried everything. The only thing I’ve really been able to get Inside was a tampon but even so, it depends on the size. I don’t have periods anymore but maybe around a year ago I tried to use one of them extra large ones. (I don’t really know the size names or anything because it made me uncomfortable and I’m new to tampons) but, it wouldn’t go in. But regular sizes worked fine. I’ve tried fingers, only 1 can actually fit but it’s always painful and doesn’t feel good at all. I even bought a toy, it won’t go in. I tried lube, a condom, spit, water and nothing. I can feel it trying to go in but it’s so painful I have to stop. The weird thing is that when I was maybe 11 or 12, I took the handle off of a non electric vacuum and shoved it in and it worked. It went in, I don’t remember if there was any pain or anything but it did pretty much fully go in. I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong but it’s so weird that I didn’t have this problem years back with an object. Sorry if I worded this very weirdly, I’m extremely tired. Also I’ve seen people on other apps say that it’s due to age when other people my age have had similar issues. But personally, I find that bullshit because there’s people younger than me who have been sexually active. Even an old friend of mine was at my age too so I Don’t believe that. And to my knowledge they had no issues. Forgot to add, I don’t have pain when I cum, it’s just when I try to put something in. Also when I did have a period and used tampons, that didn’t hurt at all.
3 comments
Might be a good thing to review with your OBGYN.
so first of all, it might be something to mention to your doctor just in case there’s any medical concerns, and another thing you might want to try is maybe going to therapy because if you have any past trauma, or sexual trauma, that might be repressed, that could be somehow, causing your body to be tensed and tightened up.
but also more likely, the most common thing is a lot of sexual issues are all just mental blocks so it could be that you’re just not in the right headspace before you do this maybe try tackling your brain because the biggest sex organ in your body is actually your brain, so maybe instead of touching your genitals or anything like that first focus on your brain and turning yourself on mentally so put on a favourite show that turns you on put on some porn. Read some erotica listen to podcast about Sex . Put your brain in your mind thinking about sex often. you see when the bodies in the brains not used to being turned on it might not know how to but if you put on porn you watch porn or you read erotic are you yourself in mentally sexually stimulating situations like that your brain will learn that and recognize that and then later on be able to replicate that because it knows oh yes, that feeling of being horny that was a nice feeling I want to do that again. and then, when you feel your body is extremely horny because you’re watching the show and you’re not focussed on trying to fit something inside of you trying to fit something down there eventually your body will just relaxed because you’re not focussing on the end goal, you’re just enjoying the process of stimulating your self. Your mental stimulation sexual mental stimulation. I think you’re the problem is is that you’re focussing on trying to get something inside of you and you’re getting in your head and it’s blocking you from actually making it happen actually making it possible. where is if you just let your body enjoy being mentally stimulated and mentally aroused. Then I think your body will relax because you’re not focussed on enjoying internal stimulation. and you could also do other types of stuff and you know play with the outside play with your butt hole play with your anus play with your nipples, stimulate yourself in every other way other than going inside you to see how all those different stimulations can turn yourself on and then after doing that then try again and see how things go. you could even get some toys and start teasing at your butt hole and eventually you could even give yourself an anal orgasm and then seeing how that changes affects you and affect your ability and in to have something insert into your vagina.
I know this is all a lot of information, but board thing is to remember is to never give up because if you give up, you’ll this will only get worse overtime where you tackle it now and keep tackling no matter how long it takes just enjoy the journey in the process of discovering your body, you’ll eventually figure this out. I mean you’re only young you still have a lot of time to figure this out but if you give up and you stop, then you’re gonna miss out on so many years of your sexuality in your sex life.
also, another important thing is to not let this hold you back in your sex life and dating and whatever you wanna do in that regards. sure this might be something that scary to talk about but once you learn to talk about this and explore with partners in other ways, in terms of massages and stimulating other parts. this will help you build your confidence in communicating and talking about sex and sexuality with your partners. because most people go, their whole lives never truly learning how to properly talk about sex and sexuality, and then they miss out on having the proper in the sex life they want and deserve. so if you start now at this age, slowly learning to talk to your partners about this about sex sexuality, then you’ll be able to build yourself and end up in the relationship and then in the sex life that you want desire and deserve. all these issues that you’re having don’t stop you from deserving to have a great sex life. and you still can have an amazing relationship with a partner, an amazing intimate relationship with the partner by doing whatever else you need.
I also recommend you talking to your doctor, or someone about trying some dilating kits, which are special kits have a bunch of different size dildos that you could slowly put inside you to maybe increase in size. So for example, you would start with a dildo that’s the size of a really tiny thin pencil and then you would slowly bill. You just put it in and you leave that small dildo in whatever the size you can take for a little bit of mountain time for maybe an hour or 10 minutes a day and then eventually you would leave that in for 20 minutes a day and then eventually you’d build up to a slightly bigger dildo and leave that in for 10 minutes a day and then leave that in for 20 minutes a day and then leave that in for 30 minutes a day and then slowly build up and dildo size until you get to a size that you like.
but for now, just keep trying keep trying to see if your fingers will fit and enjoy the different sensations and remember to only use stuff that is actually made to go inside your body don’t use anything that’s not made to go inside your body or you could hurt yourself .
can I know there’s a lot of information so most importantly, to remember is to never give up and never let this stop you from having the relationships that you want just communicate, and never give up communicate, and never give up. you deserve a great sex life and you’ll get there eventually you just have to never give up and communicate.
Taking hormone replacement therapy will reduce vagina lubrication. You’ll need to use a lubricant