Men who have been emotionally abused, how did you cope/recover?

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1. Poorly

2. Went too the gym too get rid of all the build up anger

3. Relationship naturally ended eventually. Next few months and years I began to recognize many actions that were abusive and I wonder why I put up with it. At the time the gaslighting might work and you might feel like the crazy one or the unreasonable one but you’re just being manipulated, and it took me until after the fact to fully realize. At the time I knew I was being fucked around with but not the extent. The best “cure” is just getting away. You can’t change the past so the best you can do is recognize the red flags for the future and don’t deal with it

4. Went through a second adolescents in my late teens and early 20s being a fucking slacker to unpack all the bullshit.

5. Honestly, finding someone trustworthy to talk to helps, but i have been out of that situation for a few years and even still effects my day to day. Mine came from my stepfather and started at a pretty formative age, and now in my mid 20s i still get anxiety around older male figures regardless of whether we had ever had a negative encounter or not. I think to myself that it is something you learn to live with and something you can use as a guideline on how to not raise a child. I now have 2 kids of my own and I will be DAMNED if I implant the same belief that they are worthless or not good enough that I was given.

6. Iron church, venting, meditation,video games, friends, sex, Work.

7. Tried noumerous things, neither of which have been succesful.

   – Therapy. Nothing is truly as dogshit and overrated as therapy.

   – Looking for other role models in life. All of which rejected me and saw me as a burden.

   – Going to the gym. Nothing has ever made me feel more insecure than that. Being surrounded by all these superior people looking at me like WTF i’m doing there.

8. Lots and lots of therapy.

9. I cut toxic people out of my life like a tumor, did the therapy to process my shit, and didn’t add new people back into my life until I was healthy enough to pick out the relationships that I needed. It’s fucking hard, and I still struggle with feelings of unworthiness sometimes, but you can do it!

10. I’m fine.

11. Step 1: Found a woman that wasn’t a toxic mess.

    Step 2: Marry her.

    Step 3: Have her convince me that I needed mental health help.

    Step 4: Get help from a professional.

    Step 5: Profit!

12. Therapy, videogames, my son and work

13. I think in a lot of cases, cope/recover isn’t some defined moment, but an ongoing struggle. I’m still learning to identify what thoughts/perceptions are truly my own vs. a reaction to the trauma.

    I spent most of my late 20’s self medicating, and avoiding any real emotional vulnerability. Therapy helped, positive friendships helped, but a lot of my growth came from realizing i’ll never be the person i was before.

14. I didn’t

15. I never did.

16. It depends on the nature/dynamic of the emotional abuse and the age you were when it occurred.

17. I didn’t, to be honest. My self-esteem is in the toilet, and it has probably contributed to my absolute joke of a social life. Try to take a step forward, and I end up an entire staircase back. Who knows if I’ll ever get there.

18. By ending that toxic relationship, having a great support system, and learning that it can get better with the right people.

19. I didn’t. Almost impossible to fully recover from emotional abuse because you just can’t forget it. However, i feel i started healing the moment i experienced love for the first time in my first serious long term relationship.

20. It took a long time, mostly because I tried to deny that it had damaged me. When I finally did acknowledge the trauma of it, seeing a counselor and a hypnotherapist helped. Moving in with friends so I wasn’t living alone was a big deal for me, too.

    It really started with recognizing and accepting the truth that I had been emotionally abused for nearly a decade, that I had damage from that, and that I needed to accept help.

21. I think I may have been emotionally abused growing up. I don’t think I’ve ever really recovered. And often I think my learned resentment towards women is something I’ve used as an unhealthy coping mechanism.

    It just seems easier to blame women for treating me so terribly my whole life instead of taking responsibility as being the reason I’ve been treated like crap my whole life.

22. Stayed single for 4 years to figure out my shit. Then I found the one

23. Still trying to

24. Therapy, patients, lots of self patience, and learning what self love means. Also more patience. And a little more patience sprinkled on top. And some more therapy.

25. “re cover”?

26. Distance + Time