How can you turn around a bad childhood and use it as an advantage?

I have come to realize that I have been growing up in a toxic home. My parents never argued, and I grew up being told that all of my problems were small compared to everyone else’s. And I did truly believe that I was spoiled for so long even though I actually was emotionally neglected.

Even when I realized that my parents were isolating fron the outside world, I still believed that I had it easy. It ended up with me isolating from people as well. And my parents did not want to help me. They truly believed that they had it worse than I did.

I’m 100% sure that my mother is a narcissist. She doesn’t have a single friend and everything is about her own emotions, about how hard she had it growing up. But really her parents were extremely nice. But my mother only wants to see her own struggles.

The worst part is that i’m starting to become so self obsessed just like my mother is. How do I turn things around?