My bf (29) and I (27) have been together two and a half years and our sex has been overall pretty great. Recently, he was taken off Paxil and hasn’t been on it for about 2 months. Since this has happened, he literally lasts in sex maybe 2 minutes most times. This has created some problems for us both, one because I’m not feeling satisfied, and two, he feels embarrassed and it’s deterring him from having sex with me. What can I do to help out situation? He says he’s “too sensitive” to go for round two. He also works out of town Monday through Friday, so we only get to do this on the weekends.
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Do you normally have slow, sensual sex? Or is it more rough and fast-paced? I’ve noticed that long foreplay with slower sex makes me last for as long as my girl needs. Granted, it becomes very sensitive, and you still have to watch out, but the time I gain before I finish is decent.
It also could be a very mentally vulnerable thing for him. He knows he isn’t pleasing you like he used to, and you are making that clear to him, bringing that fear to the forefront. It’s not your fault. That’s not what I’m saying. It’s just the reality.
You might benefit from just connecting with him, trying to take that pressure off to perform. Remember, he also hasn’t seen you in a week also, and he presumably loves you. No wonder he’s finishing fast. Who wouldn’t? You are his incredibly sexy girlfriend, after all 😂 I hope this helps.
Anti depressants, such as Paxil, commonly have a side effect of delayed orgasm. In fact, they even off label prescribe it for PE (premature ejaculation).
After stopping Paxil, anywhere between 2-6 months later it’s possible for PE to resurface sometimes. Your boyfriend might benefit from consulting his doctor and possibly going back on Paxil at a lower dose or an alternative medication if he’s unable to resolve his PE by other more natural means.
If he doesn’t want to go back on anti depressants, there’s a few other medications but they’re often not as effective for some. He can also try focusing on working out more, kegel exercises, *triangle* breathing techniques, edging, pinch techniques, number sprays, numbing condoms, etc. There’s a lot of alternatives that sometimes work for men, but the important part is discussing this with a doctor!
The best thing to do is be proactive and empathetically supportive. It can be a very embarrassing topic for men, but rest assured very common! In fact, 1 out of 3 men will suffer from this.
Instead of round two right away give him about an hr. Then try again. He will last longer. I have a similar issue also but the solution is more sex not less. He’s young so there’s no reason you guys can’t have sex two to three times a day. If you guys are already doing this and it’s still happening he should try a condom. This would definitely desensitize. Or you guys just accept it and he uses toys our what not after on you. I cum fast cause I get very excited to have sex with my wife. I can’t help it. It feels amazing. Neither of us considers that a negative. So for me to give oral or use a toy on her after is not a negative. It’s just about communicating and being a good partner. There are definitely solutions for you guys as long as your open to each other and non judgmental. The end goal for both of you should be to make each other happy and satisfied. Does it really matter how you get there?
Meds delay ejaculation often, so going off of them, he now feels more and cums faster. Many can’t cum at all on certain meds.
You need nonjudgmental communication. Slow things down, use numbing Wipes, other options..
Basically, see what helps. Maybe yall need to switch it up and focus heavily on foreplay/yourself so you get off faster. Some people do everything else and then leave penetration for the end, knowing the guy is going to cum fast.
My bf can cum pretty damn fast so he focuses on me in the beginning and I’ll also use a vibrator often so then I’m already there and when we do have penetrative sex, we can still cum at the same time.