I’m 25 years old and I’ve always struggled with being social and having a decent friend circle. Throughout High School and life in general, I’ve always felt insecure because I was very shy and socially anxious, so I never had that positive experience being a teenager, hanging with friends, having girlfriends, and going to the prom because of my social anxiety and low self-esteem. It’s continued on with Adulthood and dealing with anxiety, depression, and OCD. Now, I’ve gotten so much better with my life that I have a job and going to college with getting so much professional help and doing great! I’m just been feeling really down lately with dealing with so much regret with not enjoying my youth and just always being at home and just being shy and also overthinking with having fear of rejection and that girl will not like me with trying to approach the girl that I may like. When I go out to work/school or anywhere else, I just feel like I’ve missed out on so much especially when seeing people even younger than me just having a good time and holding hands, and the pain of missing out it’s just terrible at times. Makes me think very low on myself and I feel at times like I’m in the minority and most people have the experience that I don’t have. I go to events sometimes and I try to have a good time and see cute girls dancing and I just feel afraid of approaching them in groups or on my own. I know that I have to get myself out there and learn to be brave and take the first approach and all that, but the doubt and the fear of rejection and then the overthinking get to me. But at the same time, I feel so tired of this lifestyle and I really want to change. In about five years I’ll be 30 which is crazy and at times it freaks me about. I just feel this intense pain that my youth will always be like that. missing out and it sucks. Just feeling down about that. I have to learn how to let go and get myself out there more.
1 comment
We all need to collectively realize that with how society works and demands things of us, that not getting everything together by your 20s isn’t the end of the world. I’m the same age as you and I struggle with that considering my life within a monotonous practically-enclosed space. In all honesty, the past may keep haunting you and the choices you made won’t seem like the right ones anymore, but who’s to say? There are so many little things that could’ve happened that could’ve changed everything and you’d never know. You could be on a better or worse path right now if you did things even slightly differently and you’d never know.
But it’s still one path you took and that you’re ever going to take. So my advice is to dwell on that.
Not in the way that you would be missing things, but that there’s only one result that you can’t see the details of. If you have the attitude to change, and the support to enable to you, and the faith to carry on, then who’s to say your path won’t start looking more filled with socialization. Heck, who’s to say it will? Maybe you might find like-minded people and have a closed social circle you’re perfectly content with.
Even in the case of others seeming better off, a lot of people also peak in their 20s and then never reach those heights again. Heck, a good number of them might be miserable now and only putting on a brave public front. Once again, you’ll never know. But you can at least change how you approach YOUR life and sometimes, meditating on that is the first step to carrying on.