What’s the manliest sport to ever exist?

37 comments

1. Wrestling, what could be manlier than 2 or more big, buff, sweaty, oily, testosterone filled, males grappling and rolling all over the floor together?

2. Pistol dueling

3. Medieval tourneys. Established dudes in heavy metal armor beating the hell out of each other, sometimes to the death, with mean weaponry up close and personal. We are such fucking pussies now.

4. Timbersports.

5. Bare knuckle boxing.

6. Heavyweight MMA

7. Those chainsaw competitions where guys use homemade chain saws powered by car engines.

8. Turkish oil wrestling

9. Rugby. Not my cup of tea to watch though.

10. [Calcio Storico Fiorentino](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTPWcLmWvD0).

    “Too small to be a war, too cruel to be a game.” – King Henry III, 1574; upon [witnessing a match](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8ZnRCqWioE) held in his honor.

11. Don’t know the name, but whatever sport the Gladiators played in.

12. Calcio Storico. It’s so brutal they only play once a year. Was a short doc about it on Netflix, was a good watch, real badass dudes.

13. MMA. There are a lot of combative and manly sports. However, name me something more manly than fighting another guy.

14. YT casually recommended to me a game of hurling, a Gaelic sport, that I knew nothing about. It was pretty fun and manly. Limerick won.

15. If we define “manly” as a game that reflects something about the male lived experience, the Aztec ball game (ullamaliztli) is on point. There’s a tiny goal that is very hard to hit – but that’s the goal anyway, doesn’t matter that it is borderline impossible, play the game. Similar to soccer rules, you can’t use your hands, and because the little ball is a 9 pound piece of rubber, you have to wear padding to protect your legs (although you’re still getting hurt). The little ball can never touch the ground, and if you lose, you are killed. If you win, you may also be killed, but in that case, it’s an honor to be sacrificed for winning.

    If that ain’t male living, idk what is.

16. Just gimmie hockey

17. Chess

18. Strongman tournaments, or Medieval tournaments like jousting and melees.

19. Rollerball

20. Rugby, like American football without all the pads.

21. EXTREME KNITTING. SUNDAY!!!! SUNDAY!!!!!!! SUNDAY!!!!! AT THE METROPLEX 6PM!!!!! IF YOU MISS THIS YOU BETTER BE DEEEEEEAAAAD!!!!!

22. Hurling. The Irish are nuts.

23. Probably Australian rules football

24. Swedish penis fencing.

25. I don’t know if it’s the manliest, but I heard water polo can be brutal.

26. Siberian Towel Wrestling. You basically strangle each other with a towel.

27. I don’t see how Rugby isn’t.

28. Timber Sports. Big burly guys chopping trees and having chain saw races.

29. The ancient Aztec sport where the losers where sacrificed

    https://youtu.be/8LsE6LQDryQ?si=62KOB7sRInqRujLV

30. That god forsaken rugby thing.

31. Kissing

32. Chess.

33. Shot put.

    “How far can I throw a cannonball with my neck?”

34. Roller-Derby.

    Ironically mostly played by women.

    Get in rollerskates, race, beat each other up.

    Some towns have men’s leagues and it’s a good time.

35. Lethwei. Punches, kicks, elbows, knees, headbuts, throws, sweeps, takedowns and hitting during the clinch, everything is allowed. No gloves allowed, only hand wraps, gauze and electrical tape. There is no points system so the only way to win a match is by knock out. When a fighter gets knocked out, his corner gets a 2 minute time out to try and wake him up by any means necessary (by throwing water buckets at him, slaping or even bitting his ear) if the fighter does wake up they are allowed to carry on fighting.

36. Silly question, answer can’t be anything other than hand-to-hand combat, kickboxing or MMA probably.

37. Caber tossing