So for context my(F20) gf(F23) and I just started dating and we haven’t had sex yet but she had just revealed that nothing makes her cum. She’s never came from sex before and she’s never came from masturbation before. Hearing this has made me feel distressed and defeated to the point where I’m questioning whether she’s attracted to me at all and is making me think I should just break off the relationship. I’ve made other women cum in the past but it knowing that I can’t make her cum makes me feel like I’ll never be good enough for her. I really want to make her cum but the fact that she told me nothing can make her cum makes me feel like giving up. I’m afraid to start having sex with her because I feel like no matter what I do I won’t be good at it. I really want to know what I can do in this situation because I really want to please her and satisfy her in bed but I don’t know how I can do that if she can’t cum. Any ideas and advice would be greatly appreciated.
5 comments
She literally said she’s never cum from anything. It has literally nothing to do with you, stop pressing your insecurities against her or she never will. Just be the best you can, if she says she enjoys it, believe her, pleasure is still enjoyable without cumming. Just be attentive, be a good partner, and if it happens it happens.
She’s never had an orgasm before. It’s really unfair to make this all about you and your self worth when it has literally nothing to do with you or how attracted she is to you.
I had my first orgasm after I had been sexually active for several years so I can relate to her situation. It’s fine. She’s not going to blame you.
>I really want to know what I can do in this situation because I really want to please her and satisfy her in bed
It is possible to be satisfied in bed without having an orgasm. For a lot of women it’s about the experience, the connection, the eye contact, the touches.
Get over yourself. She’s probably frustrated enough by the thing, last thing she needs to worry about your ego getting bruised.
If she still enjoys sex then just focus on giving her the best non-orgasmic pleasure of her life. She’ll be grateful for it. Don’t assume your old tricks will work, you gotta rewire your techniques to fit her. When you go down on her or finger her tell her that you want her to just enjoy it and to tell you what feels good. LOTS of foreplay as well.
Eventually you may help her unlock the big “O” but if not then you will still hopefully be rocking her world hopefully.
She may not be able to orgasm, however I’m sure she’s still capable of receiving some pretty awesome pleasurable sensations during sexual contact… Why deny someone pleasurable sensations simply because they can’t orgasm?!
How in the world did you manage to make her not being able to cum, ever, about YOU?? Maybe take a break from dating and work on you until you’re ready to be more empathetic as a partner