Men over 30 who started dating later, how did you go about it?

Hey guys,

Hope everyone is well. I wanted to ask some advice from the men that were late bloomers in the dating scene. For context I am a 23M, have never had a relationship of any kind before and just feel like I am running around chasing fools gold. Majority of my friends are now in relationships and I’m just kind of here on my own still.

I asked my dad for some advice last night, whilst it seemed like he was well intentioned with what he was telling me, it just felt really backwards and felt I really didn’t gain anything from his advice.

I’ve pretty much tried everything at this point, from dating apps, sites, going to singles events, meeting out in public, speed dating, meetup events, you name it, I can guarantee I’ve tried it at least once.

My hobbies are somewhat male orientated, gym, train boxing and MMA, most of the guys at my gym for example are in their 30’s-40’s so I don’t really bond with them as I do. Even my “Feminine hobbies”, for example fashion, skincare, dieting, I don’t really have many opportunities to try to open the door for a connection for a relationship.

My work as well is a bit of a dead zone too. 95% of the colleagues I work with are in their 40’s and married with kids, so I don’t really have that social outlet at work of anything like grabbing dinner or drinks after work. I’ve been at this company for the last 6 years, so even if someone comes along that’s in my age range they usually move on to a different job pretty quickly or don’t last too long.

Finally, I don’t how relevant it is, But I guess I am good looking? (I shudder as I typed this as I hate to sound as douchey as possible). I remember I opened up to an older male colleague ( 53M) at work recently, he told me verbatim “If I had your looks when I was 23, I would’ve been fighting them off with a stick”. He seemed genuinely shocked that I was still single and had never had a relationship.

I suppose to summarize the question I am asking, but guys that started later in the dating game? How’d you go about starting?