I (F17) am currently going on college tours and my mom brought up how I should be dating around in college and not with my current boyfriend (M19). He is currently in college, and we started dating 6 months ago. We have already gone through 3 months of serious long distance dating, we spent all summer together, and before that, we talked for 3 months long distance. So we’ve gotten used to long distance. We really love each other, yet I’ve gotten some push back from my mom. I’m entering senior year, and my mom really thinks I shouldn’t be in a serious relationship. It really hurts since I’m very in love with my boyfriend and I don’t want my relationship to end, but it’s so much pressure when she’s telling me i should let my boyfriend date other girls and that I should date a bunch of guys when I’m in college. She literally praises my cousin that dates a new guy every week in college and she wants that for me. Am i really going to be making a mistake by staying with my boyfriend in college?
TLDR: mom says my boyfriend and I should date other people in college.
6 comments
You have a year until you leave for college. Stop engaging with your mother about this.
>We really love each other, yet I’ve gotten some push back from my mom.
Ignore your mom, enjoy the time you have with your boyfriend and take it one day at a time.
Tell your mom to keep her opinions to herself. If you love him and he loves you you’ll make it work and have a stronger relationship in the end. And if for some reason things don’t work out that’s okay but don’t dump him bc your mom tells you too. Parents aren’t perfect and don’t know everything, you’ll learn through experience for yourself.
I would stay with your boyfriend. Sounds like you really like one another. It’s not your mother’s place to say who you should be dating. It’s your life. Do what makes YOU happy.
If you want to break up with your boyfriend to date around, you’re allowed to do that.
It seems like you don’t, and you are happy in your current relationship. Don’t leave simply because your mom wants you to be single for college. You still have a year to figure out what you want on your own terms!
Okay, I think what Your Mum is doing is for the right reasons, but Lord she’s clumsy!
When You go to college You will change, massively, You’ll meet new people, new friends and at some point there will be an intersect where You’ll meet a guy who has the same academic interests, You’ll like him, find him attractive and then You have that whole situation to deal with instead of concentrating on Your college work. Personally I think that’s why she is saying break up.
Thing is, this is the heart we are talking about (as well as other areas of equally powerfully controlling anatomy), and only people who aren’t directly involved can have such clinical views on what You should do.
Best way forward, do what makes You happy, try not to hurt others in the process, talk from the heart even if it wasn’t that particular body part that got You in the predicament, and stay safe.
Breaking other peoples as well as your own heart will make you colder the more you do it, leading to one day you looking back and having nothing to reminisce on other than the reasons no one is left. I’ve seen it many times, it’s not a happy place.
Good Luck, be happy, stay safe.