Just like the title says. Been talking to this guy for a few days, we had drinks, headed back to his place, drunkenly stumbled into his bedroom and kept the lights off, hooked up, and promptly fell asleep. Woke up in the morning and the first thing I see when I look up is the sun shining on a big old Rebel flag, right in my face. WHAT DO I EVEN DO HERE??? I am so very confused. I’m incredibly disappointed. I thought this guy was so sweet and uhhhhh. Here we are. Should I ghost? Maybe try to have a conversation with him? What the actual hell
19 comments
You don’t get to pretend to have a problem with that now
Send him a message saying that you don’t associate with racist A-holes. Then block.
Maybe he can just take the flag down?
Write him and say they were wrong in 1860, wrong in 1960 and wrong today. They lost the war; get over it. The Confederacy are even more “lovable” losers than the 1962 Mets – although there’s nothing lovable about a group of people that think enslaving others is noble.
Have a conversation with him. That flag can mean different things to different people.
make your decision after that.
Fun situation you got yourself in. But yeah, talk to him. Maybe he’s just stupid. Maybe he hardly understands what it means and only has it because his brothers have it.
No matter his intention with the flag, he knows the knows that the flag is used by racists. The confederates were garbage when that flag was first made and they’re garbage now. Why would you fly a banner in support of slavery?
If I were you I would just say “your decor gave me the ick and I won’t be seeing you again”
I wouldn’t talk to him. I would just ghost him. I wouldn’t get further involved with a racist.
I’m 45F.
In my personal experience, some (all?) young men are obliviots.
I would talk to him about it. I’d give him an opportunity to get a little educated about how fucking offensive it is. For all you know, he might just be a huge Dukes of Hazard fan or something and not a racist asshole.
Else, rather than ghosting flat out, tell him what a turn off that was and then block him. At least tell him that’s the reason and maybe he’ll smarten up.
Lol, I’d quietly put on my clothes and sneak out. If you didn’t use protection, I’d also pick up Plan B at the pharmacy as soon as I’m out.
So you fucked a racist. HAhaha
So what? Was he a good shag?
You can’t be that bothered by it if you’re trying to find a reason to look past it 🤷🏻♀️
👻👻👻
I couldn’t resist asking what does the flag mean to him personally.
Maybe have a real date with him and talk about everything, you will see what kind of man he is. If he is a racist, you surely quickly got his agenda, maybe suggest “ethnetic” restaurants and look how he reacts in them when he wants to go out with you. Are you white or a poc?
What would talking to him reveal that you don’t already know?
In a year you’ll be asking reddit if you should be upset that his mom got you rebel flag onsies.
Some people associate the confederate flag with anti-government sentiment. It’s not a slave ownership calling card, but more of a “don’t tread on me” flag for non-marines. True it has association with some evil people doing bad things, but so does the American flag, the cross, the Quran, and the ASPCA if you want to get down to brass tacks. Are we going to trash every symbol, flag, statue, and book because it was found to be offensive to someone? That would not be American, in fact it would be antithetical to being American. Talk to this guy about the flag, ask him what it symbolizes to him. If it is simply being proud of his southern roots, that is one thing… if he has fear/hate in his heart for people that he’s never met because of their ethnicity, then you need to do a better job selecting your partners.
Tell him you have African American roots