My boyfriend (26m) and I (28f) have been dating for around a year and everything so far has been good! The only issues I’ve been having is our sex life.
He’s 6’3 and I’m 5’2 and we have some issues with positions. We barely do missionary since our height gap is a little wide and his dick size is I would say average so he kind of struggles positioning himself. We do doggy sometimes but a lot of the times we do he struggles inserting it (it takes him a while that sometimes I end up drying up down there especially when the ac is on and i’m just hanging out with my butt sticking out waiting for him). This leads to it also ending up hurting (really bad sting) when he inserts it and a lot of times he ends up pulling out cause it also hurts him cause he inserts it wrong (he is uncut), and ends up hurting me even more. This kills my mood often so whenever we have sex we default to me being on top.
This frustrates me a little bit since it’s tiring to be the only one moving during sex. We do a lot of foreplay though and it gets me really wet but I would really be more satisfied with PIV. He also never comes from PIV and he can only ever come from jerking off so it adds to the frustration.
I think part of it is his inexperience (he’s only ever dated one person and no hookups too afaik and it also shows since he can barely unhook my bra without looking at it and using both hands. He even asked me to get velcro bras which I found realy funny haha)
I’m just a little confused since all the past partners I’ve had there has never been an issue, even had some come from first insertion and I would say I’m involved and mindful when having sex. I’m just looking for advice on how to make it better for us and communicate in a way that wouldn’t make him look like he’s inadequate cause I love him very much and don’t wanna hurt his feelings.
A girl just wanna get pound without having to hear “oh the pillow isn’t high enough” or “it’s the bed it’s sinking” and just not do any work for once, you know? Lol.
Advice appreciated!
3 comments
As you said, he is inexperienced. So, it will take some time for him to understand all these things. But if you talk and try on single things at one time, he can learn faster.
For me this sounds like he might have a bit of sexual anxiety, just by how you describe situations it sounds like he might be scared to mess up or “break” you, I would suggest that you ask if its ok if you are a little rough and tell him exactly what to do and when to do it, and be a little dominant doing it.
I know this differs greatly from man to man, but generally speaking all the men I know love it when a woman knows exactly what she wants and is not afraid to say it.
We have to stumble enough as is around women on a daily basis, being afraid say or do anything hurtful, that mentality carries over to the bedroom.
Similar height difference with me and my husband. A sex wedge is a life saver. They come in all different heights. Huge difference much more comfortable for us both