So I’ve been SA’d a lot.
\-Cousin (no sexual thoughts here at all, just disgust)
\-Acquaintance, same as above
\-Man #3-8, same as above
\#-9- In this instance I ‘initiated’ sex with someone when I was so high I kept passing out during it. I thought he was gross/unattractive before I got high. I dated him for a few months after and he was really abusive. I’m EXTREMELY fixated on him/the incident and it’s been 5+ years. It’s honestly one of my main sexual fixations that makes me feel disgusting
\#10- this guy was just a psychopath (genuinely) and made me have sex without a condom when i kept telling him i didn’t want to. I’m extremely fixated on this incident as well. 9/10 are the main events I cum to and everything I like is fixated on something they did to me.
Lol. wtf. Please help
2 comments
Maybe seek therapy so u can work thru this. The repeated abusive situations basically became normalized. So your mind has incorporated them as familiar. But familiar is not necessarily healthy.
10 times lmaoo wtf?
Sounds like the common denominator is you. doubt anyone on the internet is gonna actually help lol. Go to a professional who can actually do something.