My(35m) wife(28f) knows this guy from her calefare acting shoots, ‘N’ that she does from time to time. There was this occasion when I joined her shoot mates for ice cream and everybody welcomed me with the exception of N who gave a sheepish hi. I took it as him being tired and didn’t think much about it.
The second occasion when I saw him was during her mutual friend’s performance and I joined them for dinner. Everybody welcomed me but this time for N, he didn’t even look at me and I thought he must have something against me.
Wifey has complained to me before about N being irritating and would pepper their conversations with sexual references. I told her to promptly stop engaging with him if she did not give him the chance in the first place. In my head in like, ‘what are you thinking?’
So I told her about my interaction with him as to how I felt slighted that he snubbed me. Her reaction was that she wanted to maintain friends and connection as she thought that he could give her good references. I think it’s bs.
My thought about him is that perhaps he is attracted to her so it explains the way he behaved towards her. I thought it’s abit weird.
I have no qualms about him snubbing me off. What I am upset about is that she keeps on engaging him on Instagram and whatsapp.
So today, she got a good news that she is going to fly off somewhere for a competition. I was so happy for her.
I was going back into the room right after I showered when I saw her sitting on the floor and catching her messaging him on WhatsApp.
I got so upset and scolded her and she defended herself by saying that he is just a friend that’s all. She said that just because I don like him doesn’t mean she should stop being friends with him.
To me it feels like a disrespect because he clearly sees me with such contempt and at the same time is able to maintain contact with her.
Wdyt?
tl;dr I hate that my wife keeps talking to this guy who disturbed her and disrespected me twice
4 comments
You come across as very sensitive and a bit controlling. This guy did pretty much nothing and you think you have the right to tell her who to be friends with?
>I got so upset and scolded her
Dude, I hope this was just written by an AI, ’cause why the fuck you “scolding” an adult for?
That kind of condescending bullshit won’t make anyone take your opinions or feelings more seriously. Only less.
You’re being hyper-sensitive to a perceived slight and extremely childish. You *may* be correct in your judgements about him, but it doesn’t matter. She gets to make *her own* judgements about her own friendships. Either accept them, or GTFO. If you have no respect for her ability to judge, leave her.
Your wife doesnt respect you and neither does the guy thats trying to sleep with your wife. The question is, what are you going to do about it? Tell your wife your boundaries on this topic. If she doesnt respect your feelings on this, then that shows the respect your wife has for you. She loves the attention she gets from him. Tough to compete with Dopamine.
Your wife doesn’t respect the boundaries you set u told her you’re not comfortable with that one friend and to stop contacting him because he stear the conversation into sexcual talk .
Is he part of the trip because if he is that’s not a good thing . U may look controlling but almost every story about cheating start with wife/husband texting a co worker to much . Keep an eye on the situation and don’t act until u see something suspicious or put your foot down and set boundaries again with consequences when broken . Good luck.