How do I (30F) tell my fiance (29M) his lack of financial stability is making me want to leave?

We recently got engaged back in August, and have been dating for over a year prior. I am also 17 weeks pregnant with my first, a child we wanted. It would be his second as he was previously married and so was I.

I do not think he is abusive but if anything clueless. Due to stress or the fact he sustained a head injury when he was working as a cop and was in rehabilitation for 5 months, and this was years before we met.

I will say, he hasn’t had any issues before hand with jobs and his family has said he hasn’t shown any concerning signs. He has a good paying job now. The only thing that can seem odd about him is that he does forget some things, not often. He also doesn’t know how to read the room at times when people say things.

We want to elope, I gave him a budget of how much that would cost and told him to start saving. He said it was doable since he has a decent job. We’re not rich but surviving. Prior to this we did talk about finances. I had no concerns prior as he always communicated until recently he told me He’s late on paying the loan for the engagement ring and even heard a collections call he took for it. He’s actively $89 in late fees and counting for the ring.

I started to stress out when he said he wanted to elope this year instead of waiting till next year after the baby is born. I had to drop my FT job down to only 10 Hrs a week as this pregnancy has been difficult for me. It pays my credit card bill, my car bills and my cell phone fine. I told him I could up keep my bills if he’d throw what he did with overtime & whatever extra he could put away into our elopement fund. I’ve also just recently moved in because I’m pregnant and also because he kept asking me.

I have cut down on my spending significantly. Whatever I don’t use or do not need I end up selling or donating or repurposing. I have watched my finances and the understanding was that we would equally cut back on things.

He does spend money on trading cards a couple times every other week or so. Doesn’t sell the ones that could rake in some cash, and has been spending money on food, and energy drinks. We do eat out a lot and I hate it. He throws things away like it’s cheap to get a replacement or like he can’t just wash and sanitize things. He threw away a perfectly good electric kettle he spent $8 on because he thought the mineral deposit was mold. I was livid. He said he came from a poor background, but the more I listen and observe his background was just being raised financially reckless.

I have tried talking to him about all of this. He tells me not to worry and I told him his credit score is going to worsen even more with the late payments. I’ve already paid off one credit card. I have made money from small side gigs but he is giving me flack for spending my own money on a $600 course. Which I can get the money back and that is guaranteed. I told him about the course and how I was using it to up skill trying to do freelance from home. I also am realizing that I don’t think he’s been getting his mail so I’m truly not seeing how bad the bills are piling up.

I’m stressed and not sure how to talk to him on this when it seems like he’s not realizing how bad this is becoming. I’m also not worried about being a single mom. I have a good support system and my state has good assistance for single moms.

What can I do to better handle this topic in a conversation?

Tldr: Fiance isn’t paying on engagement ring and is spending money on food, energy drinks & trading cards. Collect calls keep coming in. I”m stressed & pregnant and fiance wants to elope ASAP and not the following year. I’m now hesitating.