You’re a burglar, but you only steal things to slightly inconvenience your victims. What are you stealing?

34 comments

1. Q tips

2. Breathmints

3. Nail clippers.

4. Shoelaces

5. tampons and one shoe of a pair (or pairs). maybe individual socks too.

6. People’s ice scrapers from their cars.

7. Batteries. Loose and the ones in devices.

8. Phone chargers

9. Lightbulbs

10. Toilet paper, toothpaste, phone chargers, the letter E key off every keyboard in their house.

11. The middle two sizes of all measuring spoons/cups

12. Router

13. The felt pad from one leg of each chair at the kitchen/dining room table.

14. The light switches on lamps, the ones near the bulb that unscrew

15. Toilet paper

16. I’m stealing most of the coffee. I’m leaving enough for one incredibly watered down cup. Nothing’s worst than having a morning routine absolutely fucked.

    For a major inconvenience? I’m stealing the house keys. Not all of the keys, just the house key from everyone who lives there.

17. Phone chargers

18. Scissors, aluminum foil, and toothpaste.

19. I’ll steal a half billion from Bezos, I bet he’d barely notice

20. Toilet paper. But I don’t take it. I just put it the wrong way on the holder.

    I also steal their wifi and run torrents 24/7.

21. Toilet roll holders and one of each pair of socks

22. Usb chargers.

23. Toilet paper and seats.

24. 10mm sockets

25. toilet paper

26. Someone stole the faucet head off our kitchen tap at one point so the water sprayed everywhere until the landlord bought a new one. I’d have to vote for that, that was certainly slightly inconvenient.

27. A billion dollars from Musk.

28. I would steal 5 inches of the wires connected to the breakers in the breaker box, but leave them outwardly appearing to still be connected to the breakers.

29. Salt

30. Computer power button so a stick needs to be used to operate it

31. The favoritism of all their pets.

32. Replacing every USB-C you own with Apple Thunderbolt

33. One hand from each lego figure, assuming they collect lego sets. Or 1 wheel.

    All their spare light bulbs and replace some with burnt out bulbs.

34. Yard gnomes or garden gnomes or whatever those creepy bastards are called.