I met a great guy online through a video game and we hit it off quick. We talked all day every day for months before deciding to try a LDR because we didn’t live very far from each other. We both made great money working in tech and could visit on the weekends often and it wouldn’t feel too much different from a more traditional relationship. Overall we were together for 9 months.
I told him I was in love with him a month into the relationship and he said he wasn’t quite there at first but quickly came around and said he loved me too. My best friend adored him and they talked sometimes too. But I had a nagging feeling that something was missing, I just didn’t know what and I’ll admit at times I was hot and cold with him.
We started talking about kids, marriage and living together. That’s important of a long term partner to me. I’ll admit it was pretty fast and maybe I came on too strong but I really did love him at the time. He was a great guy, funny, smart and attractive and I saw a future together.
8 months in we took a trip overseas together. No arguments of any kind, the sex was great and he treated me well. I honestly had a lovely time. We sat on the beach dreaming about our future together and it was an amazing vacation, but I just had a nagging feeling in the back of my head.
A few weeks later he flew out to me and I decided I didn’t want to be in this relationship anymore. There was nothing wrong with him really, I just didn’t think we’d be a good match long term and no longer saw a future together. At the end of the weekend we had a talk about it and he was very hurt but accepted. He said he’d like to be friends after a period of time but didn’t want to talk at all until then so I said I understood.
Two months later him and several of my friends have been talking this entire time. He told them about the breakup and made me out to be some heartless monster. Now I’ve lost friends over it who basically told me how I handled the end of the relationship and “love bombed” him was messed up and they can’t see me the same way again. I tried to explain my side of the story but they wouldn’t listen. I don’t know what to do about it and I’ve tried reaching out to my ex to talk about it amicably but he blocked me.
How do I salvage this?
Tl;dr Got into a LDR with a guy I met online. Dated for 9 months. Decided after our last vacation together I didn’t want to date him anymore and now I lost a bunch of my friends.