So I’ve been working at this new place for a solid month or so. During my first day a few others also began working at this company. One of those new employees was a woman who’s a year older than me. We were a new group of employees so we decided to have lunch together on our first day. We all got along pretty well, but the person I had the most in common with was this woman who had also just started. She has a beautiful smile, a sweet personality, and most importantly there was some great chemistry between us. From there onwards we started to converse on a daily basis. It started as work related messages but it soon switched to more personal stuff. We’ve been getting along really well, not just on through text messages but during our working hours as well. We’ve been desk mates since the beginning and she sort of became my best friend at work. Then last week happened. I asked her out for a drink. She suggested to visit a brand new rooftop bar near our workplace. We went out last Sunday and had a splendid time. We talked about basically everything, from things such as favourite holiday destinations and music, as well as topics as family struggles, our youth, videogames, our upbringing and so on. I felt like we really connected. However during our first date she mentioned that she was also talking with another guy through a dating app (started from before we met). I was surprised, but she told me she wasn’t sure how to precede because while she had some feelings for him, she also wanted to get to know me better and see where things went. I didn’t dwell on it so we moved on from this topic and had an amazing rest of our day. In the end we hugged and said our goodbyes. She then told me she had a fantastic afternoon and was hoping we could do this again. Then today is where things get worse. She had to visit someone after work so I couldn’t talk to her in person. So I messaged her instead asking her if she was willing to go on another date this week or possibly the next. She took a while to respond but when she did she told me she has feelings for this other guy she has been talking with. I honestly should have seen it coming but it still crushes me. I know we only went on one date but I honestly feel so good and relaxed around her like I can be myself. I don’t have that feeling with any other girl I know. Sorry for writing an essay on her but I just needed to share my thoughts with someone, even if you are strangers. I feel like proper shit and the worst things is, I have to see her again tomorrow at work.
11 comments
Your shit’s all fucked up.
You seem to be spending too much time on reddit, pewdiepie and posting shit about GTA V.
None of that is going to help you with your confidence, if you really want this girl then fight for her man.
Go work out, stop crying over some girl who didn’t choose you.
Somewhere along the line she was either never interested or that other guy simply won, so analyze what you can do better and improve yourself that way.
Forget about your romantic feelings for her atm, it’s not gonna do you any good at the moment my guy.
Focus on yourself and good things will come along, but hey what do i know im just some random idiot on a messageboard.
Take care of yourself!
Sometimes you win out and sometimes you lose. That’s dating bro but don’t dwell on it. It sucks, but trust me. There are plenty of women out there. Do some soul searching and find out why you might’ve lost out to the other guy.
That’s life.
Cry. Let it out
cry it out homie
Don’t do it. It’s just a girl.
You don’t date co workers.
When it ends, it ends badly and becomes an HR nightmare.
You got lucky and you don’t even know it.
Paragraphs. Learn to type in paragraphs. I don’t understand why so many people post walls of text.
Honestly, if you need to, cry and let it out. It’s always better than holding it in.
It’s ok to cry. Let it all out. Cry like you’ve never cried in years. Cry like Crono just sacrificed his life in his fight against Lavos. Cry like Aeris just sacrificed herself for Cloud Strife and the good of Midgar. Cry like the Raiders just won the Superbowl for the first time in over a decade.
You’ll feel a lot better after a good cry. And you’ll get over her a lot faster. Then the next time you go to work, go to your supervisor and request a transfer to a different department. If that isn’t possible, then at least request to be moved to the farthest corner of fhe office away from her or request to work remote. And you work for the next promotion. Work hard for it, apply for it the moment you qualify and move up the corporate ladder. Eventually you’ll be so far up the corporate ladder making an obscene amount of money that ironically, other women in other departments will start to take notice and chase you for a date.
So if you do date again within the same company, make sure that girl is in a different department totally unrelated to your department.
DO NOT under any circumstances open that door for that old girl again. Strictly no contact going forward and if she initiates, shut that shit down but keep things professional. Do things by the book when you’re around her. Always look out for number one, you.
There’s nothing wrong about feeling sad. Love can make or break you. Yet you can decide to build yourself back up. Keep going, something will work out. Keep pursuing self improvement. Good luck! I’d wish her the best of luck. Even though you may feel crushed, you got pretty close to success. Your story isn’t over. You had better success than most guys. I got rejected recently too, it hurts. But don’t take it as a hit against you or your character. Learn to move on. Please respect her decisions, it helps you value her as a person. There’s not much you can do now other than heal up, and get ready for the next round. I tend to look at stuff like this as a victory. I get more time to better myself for my future wife or whatever.