What are your first thoughts when you see a happy good looking couple together and how do you feel inside?

49 comments

  8. Happened to me at the gym today. I went at an earlier time and they arrived shortly after I came in. Honestly I felt sad and kinda started crying in the gym as I never experienced being in a relationship…

    I’ve struggled a lot with being single, and have done well to steady my mental health on that topic recently. Seems seeing that couple set me back…

    The emotions weren’t fully wasted though, it motivated me to go a few extra reps on my heavy lifts and even had a solid cardio session. Maybe once I’ve lost enough weight I’ll be good enough for someone.

    Pull day tomorrow.

  11. Good for them. Cultivating and maintaining a healthy relationship is hard work, and I have a deep respect for people who put in the effort.

  13. I get the feels when people are happy together wherever it may be. My wife and I are often asked if we are newly weds when we’re out. Been married almost 28 years.

  17. I’m going to assume that you mean one of those couples that’s obviously in love, and they kind of have this glow about them.

    1. First thought: *aww. That’s so sweet! Good for them, they’re obviously in love, I wish them nothing but the best, and I hope it works out.*
    2. Second thought: *I wonder what’s missing/broken in me that makes it so this isn’t something I ever get to have?*
    3. Third thought: *guess I’m just not good enough.*

    And then I usually have to try and distract myself or leave, otherwise I’ll start a spiral, and it goes nowhere good.

  18. I always feel happy seeing that. It’s just devastating that it’s a joy I’m just a voyeur to. Not a participant.

  21. Sometimes I feel happy for them, but most of the time I don’t really care. It’s not worth thinking too much about it since I ultimately have no idea what the reality of their relationship is, which is something some people need to keep in mind.

  23. Thats pretty normal. The world is not a pool of people living in constant agony and loneliness. They are just people and I don’t have any particular feelings about random people.

  24. Good for them, I hope they’re as happy as they look.

    And then go back to my own thoughts. Why would I feel all the feels for someone else’s relationship?

  25. I usually don’t care, but for some reason seeing old people and teenagers in love makes me happy. Just reminds me of the past and makes me look forward to the future. I was walking through the mall with my wife and passed these kids, the girl shyly grabbed the guys hand and was like ‘I like you :)’ and it just made my whole day.

  26. Makes me wonder what the fuck is wrong with me. Why is life so easy for some people but I struggle everyday? Shits not fair.

  27. Indifferent usually. Annoyed if there’s a lot of PDA because public spaces aren’t the place for that

    But otherwise I don’t care

  30. Usually I think “some guys have all the luck”Same way when someone when the lotto or I see someone with a Ferrari .

    But we don’t see what goes on behind closed doors.

  31. When I was younger, I placed a high value on good looks. However, as I’ve grown older and encountered people who were good-looking but had terrible personalities or were blatantly boring, I’ve come to realize that a happy relationship has little to do with appearance. Being good-looking doesn’t guarantee happiness or compatibility with me. so whatever? It’s nothing more than seeing other happy couples. if they are happy, i’m happy for them.

  32. Aww, that’s cute. And I feel a bit happy for them… so long as they aren’t doing anything obnoxious.

  34. Look and then look away. Honestly I’ve probably seen a ton of happy couples but my brain doesn’t register it. Why? Because I don’t care and never did so I go back to what I was doing. Now if i saw a happy cute little kid it would be different. I immediately imagine what mine would look like in the future.

  40. Good for them. A bit jealous, my own relationship is crap and heading straight towards breakup. Also hope that one day i too will be happy.

  41. Goes something like: “must be nice”—> “wow, happy for them” —> “fuck, wish I had that” —> “damn, it is what it is”

  42. *what’s that like? must be nice I want someone to have my back and be happy to see me*, followed by dismay/despair. It was like that for quite a while.

    The idea of sex or not being seen by women wasn’t even the issue, my self esteem was low enough that I quietly believed they wouldn’t want to be around me if they knew my flaws, the “real” me. I actually flirted a lot with various girls in high school and it was often reciprocated, but I never tried to date any of them because of this perspective. Even when they gave very clear and obvious signs that they were interested in me, I would lock up because a relationship meant they would have to know “me” and that wouldn’t be enough, so I avoided getting entangled.

    How did I get to that point? Well, my mother was emotionally volatile during my childhood. If she was mad about something, it would be radio silence for about an hour and then she was just mad. This was a transitive property, so any other thing she disapproved of became part of the scolding. If I argued or “talked back”, then she would tell my dad and he would always take her side, so there wasn’t any avoiding it. If she got back home from work in a bad mood, I would avoid her. It wasn’t like that all the time, but it happened enough that I grew into a teenager being accustomed to not telling her much. My father….well he wasn’t around for the first ten years of my life because of the military so he never really learned how to *be* a dad to me and subsequently, I didn’t tell him much either. Religion also played a role and some topics were just not discussed because I wasn’t looking for a lecture.

    And then after high school, I enlisted in the military and experienced a whole bunch of stuff that affirmed my low self esteem. Our platoon during boot camp was nicknamed the “booger platoon” and fittingly enough, one of my instructors was demoted and discharged for hazing. One of my first leaders at my permanent unit was a woman; she straight up told an officer that I messed up an important task because I was retarded and assumed no responsibility for not supervising said task. *later on, I told her she reminded me of my mother and looking back, I was saying a lot more than even I realized*

    After the military, my first attempt to have a serious relationship ultimately ended with the lady ghosting me and then re-appearing when she started sleeping with my friend I had introduced her to previously.

    It’s not real fun coming to terms with the fact that the empty feelings when I saw a happy couple was the dissonance between what I wanted and what I had experienced, especially when it means thinking critically about being a kid.

    TLDR: I felt my own issues

  45. Somewhat envious.

    I was married for nearly 14 years and much of my marriage could best be categorized as “hellish”. I spent as little time as possible with my wife for the last several years of our marriage. I wouldn’t want to walk next to her – let alone hold her hand and do “couple” things.

    I had a girlfriend briefly after my divorce and we were very much the happy and attractive couple. Holding hands, joking, laughing, etcetera.

    Now I’m thoroughly single and, for the most part, I’m pretty happy being by myself. I’m just sorry that I stayed in such an awful marriage for so long.

  46. Mostly just miserable about it. Nothing personal, I don’t wish them anything bad, just a visceral reminder of isolation and loneliness.

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