How much of a difference is there between turned on sex and just sex?

15 comments

1. There’s a huge difference, physically and emotionally.

2. Well, in my case, “not turned on” sex doesn’t exist. If I’m not turned on, I’m not having sex.

3. How fast they ejaculate

4. Umm, yes. A lot. The first if I’m 100% revved up and ready can be an almost out of body experience while being completely connected to your body and have your head literally feeling like you’re spinning. Then comes…well eventually you come and that’s just the orgasmic cherry on top to finish everything off…bonus points if you keep going and do it all over.

   The just sex, well, that doesn’t usually happen. I have to be in the mood and at least a little turned on. But it happens on occasion when I do it mostly for my man that day. It’s still good and enjoyable, but not close to when I’m feeling like a complete horny hoochie mama.

5. Just sex= going through the motions mentally not there. Hurry up and get the hell off me!
   Turned in sex: baby my fire is lit get pounding on me with gusto.. and make me moan! Yah!…

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7. A lot. Being turned on is more passionate.

8. Big difference.. turned means effort was made to seduce. There’s way more of a connection with turned on sex. Sex, is just doing an act there wasn’t a whole lot of forethought into it. Just having sex is where things can become boring and too routine.

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10. If im not turned on, not only will I not do it by choice, I physically can’t (unfortunately knowing by experience). The walls won’t open and also I start bawling my eyes out. And that’s when willing and consenting 😬

11. The difference is like eating an oyster cracker (I’d really rather not -do I *have* to?) compared to the best flavor you’ve ever tasted (more please! and more, and more!).

    Sex when not aroused is… well, I don’t want to use the word rape, because it *can* be consensual, but it’s… coerced. Your body isn’t ready, and that experience can range from weird to uncomfortable to downright painful. Even if your mind isn’t coerced, if your body isn’t turned on, your body is coerced.

    Sex when aroused can also range: from a pleasantly teasing experience all the way to an otherworldly, body shaking, overwhelmingly incredible and satisfying experience.

    An aroused but unsatisfied sexual experience though… that CAN be frustrating.

12. Not turned on sex is kinda like scratching and itch that isn’t itchy. Weird, meh. Turned on sex is like being high while getting more and more bodily high.

13. The same amount of difference between consensual sex and rape.

14. I’m a proponent of enthusiastic consent. So the former I call sex, the latter intercourse, which might end up being abuse, depending on the circumstances.

15. So, I didn’t know what an orgasm was with my long-term partner, it’s only when I found somebody after the fact, that I was actually sexually compatible with that I learnt.

    I could come with my long-term ex, I never orgasmed though.

    My suggestion based off experience, is know what you like first, a secure partner will be grateful for the feedback. If they don’t like the feedback, I assure you, they’re not right for you.

    Get comfortable in your own body first, toys are your friends.