What charasteristics in a man make you feel threatening vibes?

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1. Meth head jitters combined with holding a knife

2. Talking about the Patriarchy incessantly and how our system needs to be torn down and rebuild.

3. Erratic unhinged behaviors or speech

4. Often needlessly escalating conversations into confrontations. That said, I’m always more wary of the ones that don’t react to provocations like that.

   Men who aren’t threatening because they don’t need to be are to be both feared and respected.

5. Aggressive, like he wants to fight.

6. out of no where, a stare down. “what the fuck are you looking at?” he said. I’m thinking to myself not to escalate anything: “you fuckwit are the one staring at me, what the fuck are you on about?”

7. Being over 60 with tattoos.

8. Bullshit alpha male bravado has been known to put me in “prepare for fight or flight” mode.

   Which is silly, because I’ve *literally never* seen a bullshit “alpha male” type guy actually become physically violent, and they’d probably be the first to shit their pants if things really did go sideways.

   But there’s still a part of my lizard brain that interprets that kind of bravado as a potential threat.

9. Quiet men who don’t react to men who are clearly skilled at violence.

   Any time you enter a room or place with other men present, most of the men quickly assess each other and determine who, if any, are threats. This is usually an unconscious process. The more experience men have with violence, the more this process occurs, and the better they get at recognizing the really subtle signals that a man, through training and experience, knows how to handle themselves.

   The normal response to this is subtle signals of avoidance and respect; men will acknowledge each others’ place in the social hierarchy. It’s a way of avoiding any sort of territorial pissing in the way of an overt challenge, which could lead to violence. This happens because men who are actually skilled in violence always avoid violence whenever possible.

   However, men who don’t react in this way are almost always psychopaths or sociopaths, and they always give off threatening vibes. Why? Probably because they are not concerned about the consequences of violence.

10. Any kind of irrational or impulsive behavior. Like, if the guy suddenly snaps in the middle of a conversation, or if he shows some out-of-nowhere signs of aggression. I’m always very aware of those kinds of guys if they’re around and do my best to avoid them.

11. A penis.

12. Not even tempered. Stronger emotional reactions to things that aren’t that serious.

13. all traits exist on a spectrum and too much or too litte of most of them can make a pathologic personality. Some of which are a direct threat, some of which pose indirect threats.

14. I honestly haven’t felt threatened by other men until I had meth heads living across the street, at least one of which is legit psychotic and I know they have guns.

15. Threats generally. If things are stepping up to be physical it’s usually going to be the tone. Don’t tend to get myself in those situations though and don’t notice those people until they make themselves noticed.

    Socially threatened though is a bit different.

    Hanging out with your mates and Random Dave invites his new mate Macho Bob along. We’re all here to have a good time and Macho Bob starts puffing his chest up, talking about how he once slapped a bouncer or other tiresome nonsense. Basically someone who thinks the “Alpha male” is a real thing, we’re not wolves, our species doesn’t have alphas.

    That’s usually my queue to leave because I have no interest in being around liabilities. If that’s what Macho Bob is like when sober, he’ll be worse when drunk. At the very least he’ll spend an hour hanging on your shoulder telling you “you’re alright you are mate” between random bouts of “Oi! Oi!” when a tune he likes gets played. Starting to think we should spend less time with Random Dave to be honest.

    In short, anyone who turns a fun night out into a chore by acting like a dickhead… and NOT limited to just men.

16. Generally speaking, the main ones that caused me to have fight or flight vibes have been people who typically have anger management or control issues

    I bring up these two specifically, because for most people, once you start seeing red, it’s usually a good warning for us to either calm down, or make the incorrect decision to make an irrational decision. Most people usually reach this moment and realize it’s time to back off

    But either due to circumstances they don’t have control over (lack of anger management is usually the most noticeable characteristic) or them self-imposing this issues (for example, letting pride get in the way, or them feeling self-conscious at the concept of them being viewed lesser) has generally lead to me being in altercations which have gone above the usual off-color screaming and yelling

17. Jealousy or antagonism

18. Erratic speech and behavior combined with a violent history and nothing to lose. I’ve lived in rough areas. Criminals don’t scare me. Criminals in certain situations which are likely to make a guy lose his shit, you should probably get out of way.

19. Standing eerily still while wearing a Halloween mask

20. Watch Andrew Tate. Total weirdo. The charges made total sense. He rapes children.

21. I’m probably over-confident in my ability to deal with threats, so usually I just take dudes trying to be threatening, as non-threatening. Dudes that are chill like myself are dudes I don’t want to fuck with, nor would I have to because they don’t start shit and I don’t start shit.

22. When they start punching things and breaking things when they get upset. Lack of coping skills/ lack of emotional regulation.

23. Liars or men who have low integrity. It’s a red flag. You get my introduction and a handshake but I’ll never trust a liar with anything substantial

24. Making everything competitive, acting like they’re better for no reason at all, and talking behind your back while also guilt tripping you into believing that they are your “friend”