My partner and I have been together for more than two years now, we have the most amazing relationship when things are going well but in those two years I’ve been broken up with on a number of occasions. One recently, where I can admit that I reacted in a bad way about a situation after feeling they were belittling me and pressuring me, one thing to note is I am very aware that I am not perfect and I make mistakes. I reacted in a terrible way to which they then broke up with me, after this we spoke about things and concluded that our communication was not good which made us both interpret certain things being said in the wrong way. Anyway we spent the night and in the morning I received a text saying I need space.
I’m heartbroken to say the least and feel that throughout these past few years no matter how much mistakes they made I never resorted to ending things but took time to process things and forgave. I feel that when I make mistakes (which I do and will take account for) I’m broken up with. I feel disposable and like I mean nothing, which now is taking a knock on my mental health and confidence. I just want someone to love me as I love them in in their flaws and someone to give me that same time to acknowledge my wrong doings and make them right, for us as a couple to grow.
I’m taking space too, but all I can think is that I deserve to not feel like im disposable at every argument and that I deserve better because while I have many flaws and can be hard to deal with I also know my heart is always in the right place. I try my best to make them happy but feel like I don’t or that what I say is always wrong. I don’t know what to do anymore because I truly love this person but I don’t think my heart can take much more of this. When we talk again I don’t know if I should completely cut ties or try again.