Title says most of it. We’ve both had sexual experiences with eachother, but this is a first for both of us, and while guides to eating someone out are helpful, I’d really appreciate some advice more tailored to a first timer. Communication is obviously important, but since it’s a first for her, she doesn’t really know what she likes, so what’s the best way to find out?
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Don’t go straight for her pussy. Take your time and build anticipation.
The tip of the clit can be really sensitive so don’t go straight there either, lick the hood of the clit at first and slowly test the tip. She should let you know if it’s too sensitive. If it is too sensitive just work the outer areas of the clit and hood.
The rest you can figure out and watch videos for.
Sometimes a finger in the pussy at the same time is also really good.
Good luck!
Easy. Take your time and don’t just dive in. Kiss her everywhere. Lick, nibble, get her in the mood. Make her feel sexy and special. Then don’t just lick her clit, kiss, lick and suck her all over down below. Be gentle and do not be in a hurry. You’ll know by her reaction whether you’re doing it right. Chances are she’s going to be nervous. Be sensitive to this. Make it fun. Sex is supposed to feel good and be fun. Good luck.
A good starting spot is mouth on the clit, a couple fingers in the slit. Ask for feedback with what feels good now and then. Take direction and explore. More tongue and sucking, less nibbles unless she asks for them.
If she has no idea what she likes, what you could try is starting with a sensual/erotic massage. Get some oil and a blindfold. Put the blindfold on her and take your time exploring. Start with a general massage and work slowly to the lower back, hips, then the vulva area, then switch to using your mouth. With some nice music and the right environment it can really help people be open to pleasure and find new spots to touch. Through the experience she could be giving you feedback the entire time. It can also be very sexy if you describe what you’re doing.
Digging back deep into the archives of r/sex (aka yesterday) someone asked the exact same question …
https://reddit.com/r/sex/s/GmkC5MrwT9
PS: encourage her to caress your face and head.
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I’m not clear on whether you have discussed this with her. Did she say, “I don’t know what I like”?
You two should understand in advance that it’s OK for her to change things in the middle, for example, shift position. If she starts out lying on her back, she might want to move around, like squat over your face. She should be free to give instructions throughout, if she feels like it, such as tell you to lick a different way. Some people don’t want to talk during sex.
You’ll learn by doing. You don’t have to get it right the first time. Also, a sex act doesn’t have to be performed the same way every time. For example, you could lick faster at a certain stage, or not lick faster.
The way the body builds up to orgasm is largely the same in both women and men, so ponder how that works in you. At the first contraction of my own orgasm, I will at first keep stroking, and fast. But after an instant, I usually want to stop stroking, in order to focus on the sensation and sometimes because the spot has gotten too sensitive.
Apply that to her. If she comes, then when she starts coming, stop licking and press on her clit gently but steadily. If her clit has gotten very sensitive, she may prefer that you lift off your tongue. This is one of those things you can vary: in one session, stop licking, in another, keep on licking.
While she is orgasming, you will wish to keep your mouth pressed against her so that you can feel her contractions. Even if she needs you to lift off the clit. If on the first time, she were to need to push your head away at orgasm (unlikely), hopefully, you and she can eventually work it out for you to keep your face against her at orgasm.
At the beginning, start licking slow, not like a kitten or a puppy.
And during foreplay, don’t just caress the lower half of her body with your hands. Use your head and face to caress the crotch and the thighs.
Don’t just lick her clit. Continuously nudge her G-spot with your fingertips. I lick for a few minutes before I start touching the G-spot. When she comes, just as you stop should rubbing the clit unless she says otherwise, the safe choice for what to do on the G-spot is to press on it.
You are right that communication is key. Foreplay and build up is the most important. As far as specifically what she likes on her clit it will just take a lot of experimentation. It was months into our marriage before my wife was able to communicate to me what she liked. (Both virgins before marriage). It can be hard to describe what she likes. I asked mine to just guide me head/tongue where she wants it and tell me if i need to go up/down/left/right faster/slower etc.