I’m a 22M and for the past 2-3 years now I’ve been struggling to date. See I’m 5’10, heavily tattooed and what I get a lot is that I’m quite handsome. Before 2021 I used to be able to sleep or have fun with multiple women but after I dated my ex things haven’t been the same. After I broke up with my ex I was a mess and my confidence was at a all time low! And my health wasn’t the best. It got to the point where I wouldn’t even want to get near a women since I had a feared they would accuse me of something or they where out to get me. I’ve gotten everything sorted out tho! Took a whole year away from everything Started working out and taking care of myself. So recently I’ve been trying to meet or just talk to women but I feel like I’ve lost all my game and I just got lack of patience since the minute I find something out or they do something I don’t even want to bother with them anymore .And last time I was with my Friends and a guy was cat calling me. I had no problems with it since I knew that meant I looked good. But my friends says that it’s weird that only guys have been doing that too you recently. And that got me really hurt since I knew that was true. See I don’t think it has to the with race but my ethnicity don’t really have a good representation in the dating market. Even my own ethnicity at my age group don’t date they own race. so that might be it since ever since I was younger I’ve never dated or kissed any till I was 18 even when I tried my best. It’s just frustrating since I realize the only way I’ve been able to keep a woman around is I’m fake or being mean to them. Now that things have changed I prefer to be me and kind since I refuse to manipulate or deceive anyone. But it’s done nothing but put me in last place… I’ve been the bad guy and now good guy, and I’ve realized that the only way is to be the bad guy. I don’t know what I should do! I’ve been celibate for 2 years now and it’s been a struggle. I really do want to date on the long term but I feel like the good girls find me too intimidating and I’ve only been able to attract ghetto ratchet girls with problems which I don’t want.
What is the best advice I can get to fixing my problem or what I’ve been doing wrong. Is it that im too nice now and that it seems like I have bad intentions? Or is it just a turn off to be nice in the first interdiction…
2 comments
First advice? it’s hard to read subs since it’s so long. But you actually got me at the beginning. Tattoos, taller than me… But hey, I’m 41 😂 so you need to ask someone you’re interested in. I don’t think your look is an issue here
Your “I’m just too nice” theory, along with denigrating people as “ghetto ratchet girls” and believing you have to be mean in order to keep someone around…yeah, you’re putting out a whole vibe that most women won’t want anything to do with.
Hopefully other commenters will chime in with specific things you can change, but my general advice would be to get into a healthier headspace before you try to pair up with another person.