I’m a 23yr old second gen brit with my family from Asia. Unfortunately my name is also reflective of that region and was always difficult growing up with a unusual name and people struggling to pronounce it. However going in to the working world, I’ve seen its more of a challenge as people would just avoid saying it entirely.
I have been considering changing my name through deed-poll. In my mind, its a practical option to anglicising it because I think name is just a name but making it simpler would result in less awkward moments.
Has anyone done this before and how is it been since?
Conversely would you ever consider doing it?
29 comments
Can you shorter the name? Nigerians will have complicated names (for British people) but will shorten it to Deji, or Tola or Oni etc.
Then it’s just the case of getting IT/HR to update all their systems so that’s what you are known as on systems.
Where in the U.K. r u? I’ve never rlly seen name being an issue and I’ve heard names from all over. Only have to tell people a few times how to pronounce it or have a nickname.
Alternatively it is not unusual to have an “English” name that’s what a lot of foreign students from places like China do.
You don’t need to legally change your name to use another one.
https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/918125/BULGARIA_-_Informative_note_-__Change_of_Name_in_UK.pdf
You could learn to live with the errors. It’s not so bad coming from a stranger you’ll never see again. It’s when family and friends can’t pronounce your name that you want to think of changing it. For example, my name has a Welsh double-l in it, and nobody across the rest of the country can say it. I get all sorts of attempts and have mostly just learned to get over it. My friends call me all sorts of things, not being able to get their mouths around it, and I forgive them.
But you do whatever makes you feel comfortable. At the end of the day, if people’s mispronounciation causes you distress, change it. It’s not going to hurt anyone, but your parents might be a bit narked off about it…they probably gave you your name because they thought it would suit you and would be sad to see you bow to societal pressure to have a local sounding name.
The Queen’s grandpa changed the family name from “Saxe-Coberg and Gotha” to “Windsor”, so there is a precedent.
Protect your heritage, don’t change it. People can pronounce foreign names fine, they just need to learn it
My name is Americanised Greek (it lost several syllables at Ellis Island circa 1920) and English speakers still struggle with it, but they tend to over complicate it, rather than just pronounce it phonetically.
I don’t mind the mispronunciation much, it’s worse for the person who is struggling than it is for me (they always look relieved when I help them out) and I quite like that my name is sort of mysterious (it baffles actual Greek people), which coupled with an apostolic first name, makes me unplaceable (in reality you can trace my fam back to the same English village as far back as recording peasants became a thing).
But I gained my unpronounceable name via my ex husband, so I don’t have the emotional connection that I might have if I shared it with parents/siblings etc.
If it makes your life easier to change your name (at least in daily use, even if not officially) to an amount that outweighs any negatives then you should do it.
But if you like your name and want that family connection to be obvious in your day to day, stick with it.
Especially if you don’t mind either correcting the mistakes of others (or just ignoring them).
Just be aware that changing it can cause a big old faff if work book plane tickets in your work name and your passport is in your birth name!
Absoluletly not.
>Unfortunately my name is also reflective of that region
Why on earth would that be unfortunate?
>However going in to the working world, I’ve seen its more of a challenge as people would just avoid saying it entirely.
I have the same exact issue, but you gotta correct people. It’s awkward at first but its your name, its your heritage. Don’t let people mispronounce it.
My Grandad anglicised his surname. His family moved from Lithuania to Scotland, originally their surname was Gustaitis and now it is Gooster. Which must be funny because when i tell people, they always laugh.
People can learn to say pretty much any name. I’m very much team keep your name if you like it. You shouldn’t have to make yourself small for other people’s convenience.
(Disclaimer I’m giving my kids Gàidhlig names after having been given a very common English legal name for “simplicity’s” sake. Having two names is a complete pain in the bum.)
My manager in a previous job sort of did this. But used it as a nickname rather than getting his name legally changed. I think he grew up with it as a name commonly used outside of family though.
I don’t really see how its so difficult when people misspronounce your name? People mess my name up all the time, always spell it wrong, mispronounce it etc and I take 2 seconds to correct them and no harm no foul.
Why on earth would something so trivial affect you so?
No, it’s not that hard to figure out and you can teach it to people. I don’t mind if people get it wrong because they don’t know. I don’t blame them though feel like we have a culture here of not asking for help or being afraid to not look like you know what you’re doing sometimes. If you are reading this and come across a name you don’t know how to pronounce legit just ask, it doesn’t mean you’re stupid. **Especially if you are a teacher at a primary school it will save the kid from being bullied because children find mispronunciation to be the height of comedy** .
I’m British but my father was American (ww2 marriage between my grandparents that didn’t last) and have an americanised Eastern European surname. Its a cool surname and I love it, but it does mean I can’t really trace my family history on that side of the family from before my great grandparents immigrated to the USA sometime in the 19th century.
Just putting this out there as a consideration really. It’s not a huge deal, but sometimes I do wonder exactly where they came from and whether there’s family out there we don’t know about!
I had an Asian surname but after marriage, my new surname is English sounding. What I think is amusing is how people don’t expect me to be me. For example I booked a restaurant under my name for me and my (white) friend. When we arrived, they looked at her and called her by name. I can tell you that never happened to me back with my old surname.
Anyway just a funny anecdote to consider. Even if you anglicise your name, you may just cause a different kind of confusion.
Hey Bro, if it’s Shitdik u definitely might wanna change, otherwise it’s just u being a people pleaser. Stick with ur roots and heritage @
I had a friend at uni, who was from Lithuania. He would tell people to call him Eugene but his real name was Yevgeny. I tried to make a point of always calling him by his proper name because in my mind I thought that was the right thing to do.
You don’t need to Anglicise your name. We should do better to learn your Asian name.
FWIW, my ex was a 2nd gen Brit whose parents anglicised their own names and thus hers. Now as an adult she’s reclaimed her family’s original surname as part of her heritage.
Both my first and last name are stumbling blocks for most Brits. I do correct my first name when it is mispronounced because it is short and relatively easy once you hear the pronunciation.
But I butcher my last name to a version which is easier to say in English. I wouldn’t change my name though officially and I don’t mind if it is mispronounced by random people I may never see again.
People who are closer might know my last name but use anyway my first name most of the time. 😉
I am stubborn so I would never.
I did think about it when I was younger but now I am old, I am glad I didn’t because I am now proud of my foreign heritage. And my parents. Being asked to spell it or where it’s from and all those other questions doesn’t bother me anymore either.
Fuck no.
If I have to learn that this stately home was the residence of Lord Hugh-Jympton Jockstrap-Syme and Lady Codswallop-Heatherington-Vomit then they can learn to pronounce my weird Irish name and deal with me not responding when they fuck it up, which amazingly, they still do.
Keep your name. Part of life is meeting people with fun names that are hard to say.
In the UK you don’t need a deed poll to become known by another name. You can use a shortening / simplification of your original name or pick an entirely new one and just be known by that at work and anywhere else you want. You can get IT to update your email address and whatever else declares your name to others and just use your full official name for travelling (when it needs to match your passport) and for official stuff like bank accounts. Everywhere else you’ll be known by the name you give yourself.
I have a long but really common name and go by an unusual shortening of it. Personally I’m choosing to keep the official name as a (boring) gift from my parents and use the version I choose in everyday life but you can do what feels right to you.
I’m first gen non-brit (yet) and I’m already considering anglicising my name just not to spell it out everyday
I’m umpteenth generation English (not sure what the word is) with a (slightly unusual) English surname and people don’t get it right most of the time. I wouldn’t change it. In fact work mates changed it for me. They shortened it and added a y on the end. Nicknames are common over here. I didn’t mind one bit. Keep your name or change your name but only for you. Perhaps give yourself a nice nickname and when introducing yourself say my name is such and such but please, call me Nick or whatever. You don’t need to change it legally, mate.
I’ve known a few people with none ‘British’ names that do that.
As an English person I’m always more than happy to make time in order to learn how to properly pronounce foreign names and I’m happy to learn. Please feel free to keep it!! It’s your name and it’s special!! 🙂
I fully understand – I have considered changing my name as there is a lot of unconscious bias (if not, conscious bias) that comes into play when applying for jobs, for example. It’s no big secret that a name that sounds white is more likely to be called in for an interview than an equally qualified candidate with an ethnic name.
It’s a real shame but it’s how things are at the moment.
I can completely sympathize with this. I use an English name both in my private and professional life. I only use my real name when it needs to be per my ID. It works for me and I don’t really mind. In my heart, I know and love my heritage and name, and while I appreciate people try to pronounce my real name, I really dislike the way it’s mispronounced, I love the meaning and sound of my real name and to me it’s only nice when it’s pronounced correctly. So maybe you can consider using an English name without changing it officially like me.
Loads of people I work with go by (eg) Peter when their passport says Piotr, or Justin when their passport says Iustin. We do also have others who go by (eg) Georgios and correct you if you say George.
You don’t need to “do” anything official about it, or be consistent with your work name and home name.
Nearly all the systems at my work let you have your preferred name shown, and it’s no problem that your bank account has another name.