Before the pandemic I tried to find a boyfriend but without success. All through my 20s I received a lot of rejection and being ghosted.
When covid started I gave up, we had a very strict lockdown and I took some time to heal.
Now I want to start dating again and get to know people through dating apps (I live in a city where nothing happens, even bars are empty/half empty on weekends), but I am scared that it will be unsuccessful again and I will end up getting broken-hearted and without confidence with crushed self-esteem.
How do I get past that fear? :/
8 comments
You get rejected dozens of times until getting rejected doesn’t bother you anymore. Stop being a pussy.
what i’m about to say sounds really stupid but ‘just do it’
just dont give up, if one does not succeed, keep on walking till you find it.
you will fail a hundred times before finding succes, that builds character aslong as you do not give up or doubt yourself.
find friends who have friends and that way you get to know more people and maybe in there is ‘the one’, i dont know how far you are away from cities or your financial situation but getting to know people does not have to cost money.
Give the rice bubbles a tug bruh.
“*There is no intensity of love or feeling that does not involve the risk of crippling hurt.*”
Risk comes with the territory.
No way around it.
Gotta risk it for the biscuit.
The only way to get past it is to keep trying. That fear is understandable though, try getting rejected and ghosted a few dozen times, it sucks no matter what but if you don’t try, that one good one won’t happen.
WHY do you want to date? Does your lifestyle leave actually room for someone to share life with? Do you want to step into his world, do you want him to step into yours or do you want your worlds to merge / be two puzzle pieces from the get go? Do you know why the people you approached previously rejected/ghosted you?
The answers to these questions are necessary because if you don’t know who you are, what you want and whether that makes you even compatible with the kind of man you want, you are running around blindly wasting time and getting hurt again.
Do some serious thinking here.
Never got past it never been in one probably to depressed to be in one anyways
I would say let that go and find something else to spend your time on. Take up a hobby you know you would enjoy/be passionate about all your life, that involves more people, like dancing, hiking, running, mountain climbing, gym, volleyball, swimming and so on, endless list to choose from. Physical activity preferred as it keeps your mind off of thoughts and maintains/improves your body continuously. You’ll meet people as a side effect. Key word is passionate, something you would do for yourself only, don’t just go there to meet people as I see some girls do and as soon as they get into a relationship they drop it. Dating apps are a really bad idea compared to in person.. And there’s nothing more confidence boosting than a hot toned body. The only thing that may drive someone away would be mental health issues, but physical activity and therapy can turn that around completely.