Not sure this is the right sub for this, but I figured I’d post anyways.

I (27f) am moderately healthy and active, and I just suffered a sudden and painful fall. I cried out loudly and heard someone say “what happened?” I said I was in pain and that I needed help getting up, my spine was hurt. It took me 5 minutes of struggling just to sit up, and it took me 2 minutes to stumble 15 ft to where the rest of my family were. They (mom 50, sister 29, mom’s boyfriend 60) were on their phones and talking to each other. When I asked them for help, they laughed and walked away. They made fun of me and rolled their eyes. It took me another minute to get to the kitchen (5 ft) to search for the pain medication. While I was still in the kitchen, mom told my sister to turn off the house lights for bed time, and she turned them all off — including the kitchen lights while I was looking for medicine.

Tl;dr: Am I just overreacting because of the pain?

30 comments

  1. Hate is a strong word, but definitely lack of consideration occurred here. Is this a regular thing?

  2. Mmm, maybe not hate, but they definitely don’t care about your wellbeing in this post. Their behavior sounds incredibly selfish and unkind. Maybe you need to spend a lot less time with them in the future.

  4. Wait. You were in pain, struggling to move, calling out for help and your family did nothing?

    Either they hate you or they are psychopaths. Or both.

    Fuck them.

  5. Ayo, wtf is this??? You can’t be serious, right? Is this the first time? Are you safe? Feels like they most definitely keep you to cover part of the bills/morgage/whatever tf they need paying off. Please tell me you have where to go. I’d also suggest therapy because that family dynamic totally doesn’t sound healthy and might’ve gotten a toll on you that you don’t really realize. Maybe I’m overreacting because I don’t know the full story and the background, but that sounds like a total tack of consideration with some bullying on the side

  6. Hate requires a vested interest. I’m sorry to say they don’t even have that.
    Is there anyone else you could stay with?
    If not, then I’d look at just keeping as neutral as possible, and focus on building a support network with people who care about you.

  7. They don’t understand that most serious injuries that happen in the home are from falls. If you hurt your back you need to go to the doctor.

  8. Wow! Your family sounds A LOT like mine! As someone else stated hate is a very strong word but they definitely aren’t very considerate of you at all. Have they always been this way towards you?

  11. I don’t know about “hate,” but this sounds super inconsiderate and insensitive. The only way this would not be the case is if the fall was obviously-to-them not actually as bad as you are making it sound here, and you were acting act out a bit for attention, and they’ve witnessed you do that before.

    I had an ex whose dad didn’t really know how to communicate about his feelings or frustrations, so just kind of acted out when he was upset, and after decades of dealing with that, the whole family basically just did not engage him when he was doing that. But you haven’t given us any reason to think that’s your situation!

  12. Not trying to make any judgments but they probably thought you were being dramatic. You sound like a very dramatic person considering you were able to move and did not need medical attention but rather just ibuprofen. Only thing I can think of is you have a history of being dramatic and they are tired of your antics. Obviously I could be completely wrong but that is the only reason why I think they’d roll their eyes and not show concern. If you really have never done anything like this before, then they don’t hate you they just don’t care about you.

  13. They don’t sound considerate but I wouldn’t use hate. Does this happen a lot?
    Or have you had many situations were you thought you were sick and weren’t? I know a person that’s hypochondriac and is hard for family members to take her seriously when she’s hurt or sick since it happens so often.

  15. They sound incredibly rude and disrespectful! Do they rely on you financially? If so I would do your best to cut contact with them. This sounds to me that they do not care about your well being at all!

  16. speak up for yourself. tell them “excuse me!” when they dont consider you, like with the lights. You need to make it known you feel like they hate you, just say it, just tell them, “Hey i feel like you all hate me.” Work through the feelings, say them out loud to those that are involved.

    Your life will be much easier being direct with this kind of stuff imo. Good luck, best wishes.

  18. maybe they are fed up with you constantly exagerating to be the center of attention

    maybe they are assholes

    maybe they do hate you

    maybe they thought you were joking

    hard to know why they did what they did without knowing you or them

  19. I don’t think they hate you. That’s abusive as hell though. Abuse is neglect and considering you have pain medication, I’m going to assume you have some type of condition. I would look for programs to help you be self sufficient if possible. They sound emotionally immature and lacking empathy.

  20. Hell no…. I’d be mad too.. it doesn’t sound like you cry wolf all the time so if you hurt yourself really bad then someone could of helped you.. especially left the light on for you when you were in their and just asked you to turn it off when you were done. A spine injury is no laughing matter and you could of seriously hurt yourself..

  22. Lack of empathy is sociopathic behavior. If they repeatedly lack empathy for others, especially their family member who was in desires, I wouldn’t be afraid to cut them out of your life! I’m sorry they treated you like that, my family would’ve came to help me right away.. I feel so bad for you and you deserve to cultivate a family and community who is thoughtful and compassionate 💚

  23. Why would you be confused?
    Here you’re given a chance to see your family’s true color. Maybe it is not hate, but uncaring about you is definitely they are. I don’t know how your situation is, if you can be independent by your own, please leave. If you can’t, please find a way to withdraw from them. No need to save anything; either feeling or understanding because they are “family”. Anyone with healthy relationship will help you. Even if they laugh or mock you at first, they will help you in the end. Because, how can the expression of pain looks fake? So, sadly your family is not.

    Here you have given a chance to see the truth. Save your self before its too late and toxic. I wish nothing but your soon recovery, God bless you.

  25. No. they don’t hate you.

    You can’t see physical pain, just like you can’t see emotional hurt. A compassionate person would understand you are in pain. But that’s why some people laugh when they see a person fall and other people rush over to help. Not everyone is sympathetic.

    But try to not worry so much about them. You can’t change who people are. But we can choose the people we surround ourselves with. Do you want to be the 40 year old women that is still complaining that her mom isn’t perfect or are you ready to accept people as they are? Go find your own life and your own friends who treat you the way you want to be treated. You are going to waste your life hoping they will give you something that they don’t carry inside.

  28. I’ve taken a look at your post history and it seems it’s due time that you get out of this victim mindset and move out of your family-home. Sounds like it would be good for you to get away from these people who you report force you to eat mushrooms (until you barf apparently), yell at you for leaving your clothes on the floor of the bathroom and don’t care about you falling. I’m pretty confused about why you wouldn’t extricate yourself from this situation considering you are a grown woman. Take responsibility for your well-being. Get a roommate, rent a room, attempt to get a better job. Do you what you need to do.

  29. If you really were hurt badly I’m very sorry that they didn’t sympathize! Just a thought, but is there any way that they could see you as being a bit melodramatic, and they therefore didn’t believe you? Just based on reading some of your past posts, you seem to feel that others are against you pretty often. You should work on that. It’s an exhausting way to live. At your age, if your family is still allowing you to live with them, then they must care about you. I think it may be time to start figuring out what you need to do in order to move out on your own, and do it. No excuses. Save money any way you can. Make sacrifices, so that you can afford to move out. Your relationship with your family seems like it could be benefited by some distance. And I think you can benefit from some independence from them. Good luck!

  30. OP my only devils advocate thought possible when reading this evil shit, is INFO: how often do you get hurt? And why was describing yourself as physically fit and active important? Was it to show good health before the fall? Or because they are overweight unlike you?

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