Lately, I’ve 28F been realizing that whenever I’m not with my husband, I feel like I am at peace and relaxed. Sometimes I think that I’ll miss him if I leave for the weekend to my parents, but in reality… I don’t. Every time we tend to go out together we just end up getting into arguments like literally 98% of the time. He’s quick to anger, so anytime we’re out, almost about anything can piss him off, so even if we’ve had a great day, something can make him really mad and he will let it affect him. Sometimes I even feel like I have a better time when he’s not with me and I’m hanging out with other people like my family or my coworkers. We’ve been together for over a decade, he’s the only person I’ve ever been with. Has anyone else ever felt like this? Does this mean I’m falling out of love? Is there a cure to this cycle?
3 comments
Your husband has mental health issues. It’s coming out in your relationship. You can communicate and try get him go therapy. If he is unwilling to understand and communicate without getting angry with you. That’s red flag.
Of course you can be annoyed with your spouse. Everyone does sometimes. That’s not the red flag. The red flag is his behavior. It is not normal to argue often let alone most of the time. It’s not normal to have a better time away from your spouse and think that you wouldn’t even miss them. Sounds like you just don’t really like him anymore because of his shitty attitude and your relationship sounds miserable. Despite what reddit has told you, it’s not normal to be miserable in your marriage.
At least he acknowledges his negativity.
But real change even if a person wants it is really hard. Sometimes it’s just their personality they developed and their unhappiness etc.
Maybe he could see a therapist to see if there are issues he could talk out and feel better and be a more pleasant person.
Or not.
If doesn’t sound sustainable to feel better when not in his company.