I 29(m) cant meet emotionally available women.

So I’m a 29 year old virgin who is trying his hardest to overcome my deep rooted anxiety and paranoia to actually put myself out there and find something meaningful, but I keep finding emotionally unavailable women. Every time I meet a woman who I’m attracted to enough to actually want to ask out and pursue we’ll talk, and move onto dates where I come up with nice relaxing places to go to where we can get to know each other and have a real chance to bond. Usually they go great, nice banter, eye contact, great rhetoric (at least from my perspective so grain of salt and all that), but usually by the second or third date they’ll drop some type of bombshell about their past trauma (stalking, abusive exes, etc…) and mention not exactly looking for a relationship. Now as someone with empathy and a not so pretty past myself I fully understand and support not being able to emotionally dedicate yourself to a relationship and will tell them that. But then comes the separation some keep trying but eventually have to cut me off, some use the trauma dump as a precursor to end things, and others just try to be friends. Now quick follow up to all this I am currently talking to a girl right now and to no ones surprise on our last date (#2) she told me all about a pretty messed up stalking situation and let me know that she likes me but is afraid that she might not want a relationship at the end of the day, and me really liking this girl just told her to please let me know immediately if she wants to cut things off I really can’t handle being lead on again. Now this long winded post is more rhetorical than anything because this is def a pretty subjective experience, but I still have to ask is this happening to anyone else like I feel like a fucking crazy person at this point.