I’m 23 and my boyfriend is 33.
He has asked several times to take photos of me and he’s also asked for photos of me in this way and I’ve never been comfortable with that kind of thing. I’m afraid that he’ll realize that he hates my body or share the pictures with his friends and they all will laugh at me or something.
I try to take sexy pictures but they never seem to come out right. I also try sending him suggestive messages but many times I’m just not sure what to say.
I feel so silly asking this here but any tips for getting comfortable with this sort of thing?
14 comments
If you don’t feel comfortable don’t do it and say no. He should stop pressuring you by asking so often.
If he’d break up because if this, you dodged a bullet. Also if he shares your nudes you can sue him. That’s pretty illegal.
You can send suggestive pics without being naked. Look at some boudoir photography ideas they may help you improve you sexy pics to the point you are comfortable with.
If he’s pressuring you for something you’re not comfortable with you need to sit him down and set hard lines. No good man will pressure you to do anything, I speak from experience with a terrible ex and an amazing current partner.
> not comfortable doing it
Say ‘No’!
You’ll regret it later when/if the relationship fizzles.
Taking sexy pictures of oneself isn’t as easy as it might sound. All those instagram girls that post sexy selfies, they probably do dozens or more before they have one they can post. So don’t expect to pose in front of a mirror and take one selfies and be satisfied with it. Especially when you have some insecurities regarding your body.
Has he even seen you naked in real life. Because how you write it, it hints he has yet to do so.
And yes, there is absolutely a chance that your pics will land in the hands of others. They might laugh because the don’t find them sexy or the might even use them to rap because the do find them sexy. If you ever decide to send out revealing pics of you, you have to be aware that you lose any control what happens with them.
So I would only do this for a partner you are sure would handle this responsible even after a break up.
If you really want to send him pics, I also suggest that you start small. Wear something with a nice cleavage and make a pic. Next time maybe just with your bra or a nice bikini. Do it at your pace to become comfortable with it and also gain some experience with taking these pics. There are probably tutorials out there for taking sexy selfies. Just google it.
The internet is forever and I know more than one woman who has regretted sending pictures.
Personally I don’t send anything that I would be uncomfortable with if my grandma knew about it.
I also work in a field where stuff like this getting leaked could be devastating. Not worth it to me.
He’s failing dating at his age and manipulating you.
Don’t. They will end up on the internet.
Why? Nude photos can be easily circulated.
Just say no to him
I think you should never send it. People are going crazy nowadays. Nobody can be trusted. What if he trade your pictures with someone. I have seen people doing it. If he pressurises you then just leave him. If i was you I’d rather click pictures together and will make sure that face, tattoos or any other identification mark is NOT INCLUDED.
Don’t do it. You do not want a bunch of nude pictures of you floating around the internet.
Don’t let these idiots scare you. Millions of people sends nudes every day and the vast vast vast majority it’s 100% fine. You’ll hear about horror stories because those are the only ones that’s ever get talked about.
If you *want* to do it but just don’t feel comfortable in the process then that’s something to work through. New things are scary but that doesn’t mean we don’t want to do them.
If you truly don’t feel comfortable doing it for some reason and he is pressuring you to, then that’s a boundary he’s trying to break. Only you know the answer to this question. We don’t know him or know you. If you trust me and *want to do this* then try and take baby steps.
Men are simple, seriously don’t overthink this. A simple selfie of just your tits will make any man happy to begin with. Then work your way up from there. Literally look on Reddit for other girls and see what poses and types they’re doing and mimic that.
Age gaps aren’t really a big deal, but knowing nothing else about your relationship other than what’s written here, this is how it reads:
Women my boyfriend’s age wouldn’t allow for his manipulative and pushy tactics, so he found someone a decade younger, hoping she would be more naive and easy to control.
DON’T do something you’re not comfortable with!!! Nude photos are forever. Especially if you think this man would show his friends and laugh?!! Why are you even with him if you think he’s capable of that kind of toxic, childish behavior?
always a bad idea to share candid digital pictures of yourself, unless you are 100% comfortable with them being publically available at some point.