Crazy realization, or it might just be me – when you put yourself out there, there are some unspoken rules when exchanging respect. Makes it difficult to rly forge meaningful relationships, even with open communication – also may be a reason why workplace interactions are easier, everyone has set standards on the job.
For example, respecting someone’s property – I personally think it’s disrespectful to even open someone’s fridge and peer at their food without asking, like a random friend who’s not exactly family to you yet. I had a roommate, who I was trying to be friends with, but he ate all of my brownies, no asking at all – we had a sharing rule. Their argument was, “well if you didn’t want me to eat them, you could’ve just told me before.” True, but it broke my respect for him big time. I set the boundary on my things, and he followed it, but socializing with this person was 10x harder now. I’ve already set the gauge on his respect for me, and it sucked.
It’s like, I could even ask my husband, “hey can we have a threesome?” and he can say no, but now that I even asked is going to concern how I respect our relationship [i might be overthinking it, but I’ve def seen this happen to other ppl too].
No one just lists out their expectations all up front like that, do they? There are like unspoken rules that people follow just by societal standards, I hope. Basics – not cultural standpoints like rubbing chopsticks together (but still a valid thing to respect).
Idk, do y’all have rules that you follow by, or hope that your social circle follows by, to get along? Are you mindful about this kind of stuff? I got thoughts