We have a great connection and I think we’re happy together, but you can’t tell he’s in a relationship from his social media – he doesn’t have any pics up of me or a status on his profile. It’s been pointed out to me that this is unusual since he does use SM regularly and tends to share stuff that’s sentimental to him. I initially thought he didn’t want his ex to know he’s with someone (she IS on his social media), but now I’m thinking it’s not just about her.
I’ve met his friends (his family are in a different state) and we cohabitate, so I don’t think it’s a scenario where I’m the “side chick” or something. But we haven’t really talked about the future either, which makes me wonder if he possibly doesn’t see one with me.
To be clear, I am going to talk to him about this, but I wanted to put it out there first to get outside perspectives – because let’s face it, those are always helpful when you’re feeling emotional.
Is it weird for someone in a long-term relationship to not have evidence of it on their social media? Is it weird that we haven’t started discussing the future yet?
TLDR; Boyfriend of 1.5 years doesn’t talk about the future or show the r’ship on social media.
4 comments
A lot of people just don’t share relationship status on social media. You’ve mentioned he had an ex. Does he have relationship stuff with his ex on social media from whenever they were together? If not good bet he just doesn’t like posting about his personal relationship which I understand to be quite a common thing.
My boyfriend uses social media a lot but it’s very specifically used as a way of sharing his hobbies and getting engagement from others about said hobbies. He views our relationship as very personal and doesn’t share relationship stuff on his SM because he simply doesn’t value getting outside engagement on something that he views purely as a personal thing.
As for talking about your future. A discussion is a two way thing. If it’s something you want to discuss then you should initiate.
Suppose it depends if it’s consistent with his usual behavior and personality. I’m married and don’t even have a Facebook account. Have never really been big into sharing my personal life in that manner. My wife has always known that so doesn’t mind
No offense but at first I thought it had to do with his age. He’s 37, slightly older and I thought he would be like meh to social media. But when you said he actually uses it often, I had a yellow flag raise.
I do find it odd if you don’t share a relationship at least 6 months to a year into a relationship unless you’re really unsure about them. Why look single? I’m assuming you have posted about him.
I found that my last partner didn’t really post me and it felt like it had to do with an ex, and maybe that he was scared it wouldn’t work out with me and it was another failed relationship that was publicized. Which I think was self sabotaging anyways because we aren’t together anymore.
So, I don’t think it’s stupid to bring up.
I don’t see anything wrong about not sharing relationship status on social media.
Personally, I just use for example Instagram to post wannabe pro photos of places and that’s it.
It’s just one and a half year, maybe he wants to take it slow or still not seeing something that make him decide what he wants to do with you.